Post # 1
Anyone seen this article?
Thought, opinions, immediate reactions?
On the one hand it’s amazing to me the entitlement some people feel. One person was quoted saying “What’s the point of going to a wedding without an open bar?” This offends me….
On the other, I’m in the boat where FI are providing Sangria during cocktail hour and champagne for the reception. We buy no means can afford an open bar and our venue doesn’t have a liquor license so a cash bar was out. We compromised with two options and I sincerely hope our guests understand and appreciate that. Though I will say, we don’t come from a big drinking family.
Post # 3
I just saw this on CNN. I’ve never been to a strictly cash bar wedding. Mostly every wedding I’ve gone to for the past 10 years has had some type of open bar. Two weddings I’ve been to there was beer, wine and a signature drink but for the most part open bar is the norm as far as I’ve seen.
Post # 4
I’m not surprised at the results…. they’re about what I’d expect and how I feel. Most weddings I’ve been to are some kind of open bar (be it full or beer/wine only), and I’ve been to two dry weddings (although at least one of those was for religious reasons… not sure if the second was religious or cost).
In general I think brides and grooms should TRY to have at least an open beer/wine bar. Obviously some people simply can’t afford it and if the rest of the day is a budget affair I totally understand. However I must admit I’d be annoyed if I went to a wedding and it seemed as though they splurged on a lot of unnecessaries like flowers and decorations and then left no room in the budget for alcohol. I feel like having alcohol is just a nice thing for your guests and it should be one of the last things to cut as you’re whacking your way through the budget.
Post # 5
I think this will just be a never ending debate. On these boards you will get the opinion of those who have to pay for it and in the magazine you will get the opinions of the guests attending.
I’ve been to strictly cash wedding and I’ll be the first to say I’m not a fan, but I am not a big drinker either. I just think of a wedding as a big party and am throwing a party like I would for any other event and I think a lot of people do the same.
Post # 6
I have to admit, I’d be a little disappointed if a wedding I was going to didn’t have at least beer/wine offered at the reception. I’ve been to weddings with full open bar, just beer/wine, just beer/wine/sig cocktail, but never a dry wedding.
I think that a lot of people like to have a few drinks when they are celebrating or going out or partying, which is what you are doing by attending a wedding. I know I have a glass of wine with dinner most nights, and that’s just at home. So, when I go out, I expect to have the option to have an alcoholic beverage.
Post # 7
This debate happens several times per month on this board. Personally, I am not a fan of totally cash bar (have to pay for beer and wine, too) or dry weddings. It’s not that I need to get drunk to have a good time, but a few beers certainly loosen things up and makes it easier to dance and mingle. Honestly, the dry weddings I’ve been to were not a lot of fun. I could see it for a daytime reception, but for an evening one, I want a cocktail.
I’m not one of those people who insists on a fully open bar, but a glass of wine with dinner and a few beers afterwards would be great.
Post # 8
We’re having unlimited beer, wine and champagne, and we’ve even received criticism for not having a fully open bar. You can never win. 🙁
Post # 9
Yeah I mean we definitely didn’t want a dry wedding, but hosting an open bar or even open beer/wine for 230-250 people is a lot of money which is why we aren’t doing that.
And Gemstone, that’s insane!
I guess my thoughts are, yes I enjoy a drink or two when I go out which is why we aren’t having a totally dry wedding, but at the same time I don’t think a wedding is the place to get trashed. I mean I know others feel differently and that it should be a big party (and more power to you if you can afford that!) – which ours will be, just not the type where people have to take cabs home…
But like I said in the original post, not neither FI nor I come from a big drinking family so for us it really was a non-issue.
Post # 10
I feel like booze is a way you show appreciating guests but it’s not a necessity. I may feel annoyed if there’s nothing there, though I don’t drink at weddings very often. I think of booze like OOT bags, or bathroom bags or favors – ways to thank your guests for participating in your wedding.
Post # 11
I have never been to anything but an open bar wedding!
If it does happen I think I will be unhappily surprised!
And I would like to clarify that open bar does not equal getting trashed! All of the weddings I have been too have been open bar and no one has been falling over drunk. Yes no one can drive home, but I can’t drive after 2 glasses of wine, but everyone is still respectable.
Post # 12
Wow, there are a lot of bitter people commenting at the bottom of that article.
Weddings cost a lot of money, and I’m sorry but I can’t afford to fund my friends drinking habits, cause they certainly know how to party! That being said, I am making it a toonie bar ($2) so it’s not like they are paying full price for their drinks. I’m also renting a bus to transport people to make sure my guests have a good and safe time.
Post # 13
@shaydenise: I thought so too! I thought that wine, beer and champagne would be enough. If we tried to have liquor for 280 guests, we’d have to cut back on things that are more important, like photography.
True, we could also cut back on guests, but I think having more people there that we love is more important than the difference between liquor and beer/wine.
Post # 14
@FMM: Are you talking about a full open bar? Just curious…thanks!
Post # 15
I truly wish we could afford to offer even an hour of open bar. But with the drinkers in both of our families, we would lose our house. We are obviously providing the champagne toast, but the reception is cash bar. $3.50 for beer, $5.50 for mixed drink. The prices are reasonable.
We hope to be able to cover wine with dinner, but our budget is stretched thin as it is – and we got deals on EVERYTHING (paying $500 for all of our flowers). But when we have 150 people, there’s only so much we can do.
We are, however, paying for the shuttle to the wedding and back to the hotel for those who choose to stay over so that they don’t have to worry about drinking then driving back to the hotel.
Post # 16
I have to say I would agree with that poll, that most people including myself would be annoyed to be at a dry wedding, and seriously offended if presented with a cash bar! But we hang with a drinking crowd so that has never happened. My view on the matter is this – provide what you can, of course take your crowd into consideration (maybe your families don’t drink, but do your friends?), and never EVER charge your guests!! I can honestly say that’s about the height of rudeness to expect your guests to cover some of your tab. Are you going to charge them for dinner too? Or for the flowers at their table? We went to one wedding that had an open beer and wine bar but if anyone wanted cocktails they had to pay. That is pushing it but still kind of reasonable. We did not have a full bar, we had open bar with wine, beer, and 2 signature cocktails – one vodka and one bourbon for all the kentucky folk 🙂
7SEVENJ9 – You know, you don’t have to pay by the drink, you can pay by the hour? If you have heavy drinkers this will save you LOADS. I don’t know if you’ll care, but you’ll probably have quite a few mutterings at your wedding about the cash bar. Just be sure to inform the guests ahead of time, either in the invite or by email or something. A wedding is not a place one expects to have to bring cash.