(Closed) Becoming Frustrated

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
405 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I think you need to tell your Fiance that he needs to step up and deal with his mother. If he wanted the big wedding in 3 months time, then he should be helping plan and coordinate that wedding. While I don’t expect most men to swoon over dress pictures and debate color palettes, I think it’s reasonable to expect your Fiance to help out with wedding planning, especially if they wanted the big wedding (like in your case).

Post # 4
7312 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

YOU should not do a damn thing more. Your fiance, on the otherhand, should get his butt in gear and get the numbers from his family… today. It’s time for him to act like a member of your team instead of sitting on his ass on the sidelines while you sweat bullets.

Post # 5
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

no way would I plan everything and beg for information for a wedding that I didnt even want. You are paying for everything and they cant even be bothered with giving you a head count? I would cancel everything and give my fiancé two options; elope or elope.lol

Post # 6
1177 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Wait, what? Am I misreading this? You’re paying for the wedding but your Future Mother-In-Law is making guest lists, etc. without you?

I’d give her 24 hours to produce a final count, and after that, those people will be considered uninvited. 

But, you can’t control what other people wear to the wedding, even if it’s white. It’s inconsiderate (and a bit narcissistic) of her to ignore your stated wishes, but there’s no way for you to stop it, so you might as well stop worrying about it.

Also, maybe think long and hard about whether you want to be married to someone whom you can’t count on to be helpful when you need him, and who doesn’t effectively manage his overbearing family. And maybe ask your Fiance if he would want to marry someone like that, and whether he thinks you should.

Post # 7
7653 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Yeah…you’ve been way more patient than I would have been. First, your Fiance needs an ass chewing, and with that he needs to put his mother in line and get the information you need. If all you have requested are numbers and she can’t produce that then I would tell her if you don’t get me the count they don’t get food. Simple as that.

Why is your Mother-In-Law making out guest lists without you anyhow? I think Fiance needs to step up and tell her she needs to butt out a bit. She is a little too involved, and I can only see that getting worse for you in years to come.

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