Bees I'm Upset…

posted 3 years ago in Parties
  • poll: I should i do about Stacys Bachelorete Party (Bparty)?
    Call Kate and ask "so did you find a date that will work for the both of you for Stacys Bparty? : (44 votes)
    83 %
    Talk to Kate and mention how excited I am about Stacys Bparty.(even though i know nothing) : (2 votes)
    4 %
    Ignore it all together, obviously they don't want you there in the first place. : (7 votes)
    13 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    752 posts
    Busy bee

    @AndysCraftsNmore:  Ooh awkward.  I would just flat-out ask one of them when the date is – if they talked to you about the party in the first place then probably you were going to be included.  Could they have forgotten to confirm the date with you, or thought the other one told you?  

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    4043 posts
    Honey bee

    @AndysCraftsNmore: It sucks being excluded from things, I had this happen at work recently with an event my team was working on at the time. The best thing to do is be straight forwad about it.

     I would just say, “Hey I heard you are working on plans for Stacy’s bparty. Is there anything I can help with?” Then you can discuss your concerns with her depending on her answer.

    Post # 5
    Member
    480 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Sounds more like a lack of organisation than a snub to me.  I would just call her and ask what’s going on and offer if there is anything you can do to help. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    752 posts
    Busy bee

    @AndysCraftsNmore:  Oh jeez that sucks!  How rude of them!  I’m sorry.

    Well at least you don’t have to go and spend $$ on a party with a bunch of rude-ass chicks at it.  Try to think of it that way.    :/

    Post # 10
    Member
    752 posts
    Busy bee

    @AndysCraftsNmore:  Don’t say the second thing – that sounds childish and reactive.  If you have to give any response I would politely say that I have plans, or I have to work, etc.  With a tight smile, then turn away to a different conversation (or end the text, or however you say it) 

    At this point I would honestly say nothing to them about any more planning things, or any events.  Clearly they don’t want you there, and why would you want to be there, knowing that?  There’s better ways to spend your time, and with better people!  🙂 

    Hugs to you, and I give you credit for even caring about this stuff when you work 2 jobs – that’s a lot on your plate! 🙂

    Post # 11
    Member
    6891 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    Since this  isn’t your family quite yet I think I’d ask your FI to find out what is going on. If it’s the stereoptypical  b party, could  they be   uncomfortable about having you there?  

    Or,  could they have forgotten that they had the conversation with you about clearing the date with you or felt there were too many conflicts with people to clear with everyone?    When did they mail invitations?  Maybe you just haven’t gotten yours yet.

    Post # 12
    Member
    920 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2018

    Wouldn’t say a another thing.  It sucks that they don’t want you there.  I’d rather not go than to go because they feel like they have to invite me there.  Since I probably wouldn’t ever be on good terms with them any more I’d tell Kate and her wife priviately that I’m very annoyed with them.  If I didn’t say anything it’d be obvious that I was no longer okay with them.

    Post # 14
    Member
    6891 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    It sounds like Kate and wife asked a bunch of people what date would work and came up with one, then ran it by you.  Yes, it would have been a lot nicer if it had been the other way around.  I do detect a note of resentment however in the “well you didn’t plan anything”.  Maybe she feels as if you kind of forced this party on her.  Stacy already had a shower.  Perhaps she thought inviting the same people to a b party is a bit much.

    Post # 16
    Member
    3874 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I would try to let it go and just go and enjoy the party. After all, it’s for Stacy, who wasn’t one of the people who planned the party and didn’t tell you, so go for her sake! You might hurt her feelings if you skip it for no reason.

    As for your bridal party, you gave a great answer, and when you do decide, this will be over and you can decide with a clear mind whether you want your FI’s sisters in the bridal party. 

     

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