Post # 1
My SO and I are about to put a deposit on a custom ring. I’m so excited! But I keep on being told that I’m going to regret it. The stone is a “rustic diamond” which means that it has noticeable flaws and inclusions – but I think that the flaws are what makes the stone so beautiful and I’m personally not a fan of clear diamonds to begin with. When I showed my mom a picture of the ring she cried…and NOT tears of joy. No, she full out threw a fit wondering why I had to “pick out such sh**”. I understand that not everyone is going to love my ring, but her reaction was so strong that its left me a bit speechless. I’m pretty darn confident in my stone decision…but then again how many things were we absolutely positive about when we were younger and now are like “my god what was I thinking?”.
So my question is – Bees that chose an alternative/unique stone or ring, did you ever have doubts about it? Do people ever react negatively and does that ever get to you a teeny bit? Or do you love it as much or even more than you did when you got it?
Post # 2
Urgh. What an awful thing for her to say! That’s so rude 🙁
I have a very unusual ring. It’s not diamond and it’s not in a traditional shape at all.
Not everyone liked it, but I adore it, even now. It is absolutely ‘me’ and as I’m the one wearing it, I couldn’t give a toss about what anyone else thinks!
Edit: Just had a google of rustic diamonds. They are BEAUTIFUL! They look so unique! Why have something that is just a copy of what hundreds of other people have? If you love it, that’s what matters!
Post # 3
- Wedding: April 2016 - Gorse Hill, Surrey, UK
Rustic diamonds look really cool. It wouldnt be my personal taste for an engagement ring, but they look great in necklaces and other rings.
If you love then just go for it, now one has to care about it except you.
I picked a ruby for my e ring, and only occasinally do I wonder if I should have got a diamond instead. It’s a very fleeting thought, as I do really like diamonds, but I just think it would look boring if my ring was all colourless.
Post # 4
Pick the ring that you want because you are the one that has to wear it! On the flip side to getting an unusual ring, my FI and I picked a very simple ring (round brilliant solitaire setting) and I get very underwhelmed reactions to my ring! I think either way some people will love and some will hate it.
Post # 5
True story- many, MANY YEARS AGO, my fi Took me with him to pick out my ering. I DID pick it out, a 4 pronged solitaire, and before I left the store I HATED IT.
The stone is an old fashioned but very pretty cut, good sized, but unstable in the original setting. After being married for 7 or 8 years, I had the ring re-set in an old fashioned yellow gold 8 pronged Low Belcher setting. Still hated it.
All this time, I’d wear CZ rings and hate the fact that I hated my ring.
After my DILs got engaged to my sons, I began to get REALLY cranky about the fact that they had really beautiful erings and I didn’t. As any good wife would, I complained incessantly about how unfair the situation was.
CLEVER HUSBAND- he tells me to go to the jewelers where we take our watches for batteries (he LIKES the jeweler because they talk politics ehenever we go) and pick out a setting I like, and have it reset.
Jeweler finds me a GORGEOUS setting, my stone fits and looks perfectly in it, everyone’s happy!
Moral? Nothing is ever really set in stone, not even stone. Things change, people change, true love endures!
Post # 6
noms…cake: Hugs to you for your mom’s reaction to your ring. That must have hurt quite a lot, and I’m sorry she wasn’t more supportive (or even kind).
Rustic diamonds are amazingly beautiful. I’ve seen so many different neat and creative settings using those stones on the internet, and I would love to have one someday. If you feel in your heart that this is the stone for you, you will never regret it — even if people don’t understand or support your choice. I think a lot of people are very “traditional” (or what society has come to see as traditional) about engagement rings. They only picture one type of ring and can’t seem to see beyond that. Which is such a shame, because there are so many amazing “non-traditional” (for lack of a better word) ERings out there!
If you come to regret your stone decision later in life, you can always ask for a different stone or setting for an anniversary a few years down the road. That way, you could have the best of both worlds.
My anniversary ring / upgrade is all clear diamonds and platinum, but it’s not a typical sort of setting. I get very mixed reactions on it, and, really, I don’t think most people care for it all that much. But I don’t regret it for a moment. I fell head over heels for it the moment I saw it, and those feelings haven’t changed a bit. I love wearing it every day — it actually makes me look forward to getting up in the morning! (lol)
I’m sure your ring is going to be beautiful. And you are going to love it. I also hope you will post pictures once it’s on your finger. I would love to see it!!
Post # 7
ann.reid.9277: Hahaha very true! At least in the end you got something you love! Unfortunately I think with the type of ring I’m getting, changing the stone isn’t really something that may be possible.
For reference this is the ring I’m getting…though that is not my stone – this picture is from the original piece that sold about a year ago, but I loved it so much thankfully they’ve agreed to remake one for me. So my stone is going to be closer to this than the ones that google pops up for “rustic diamond” – and once again, I KNOW that not everyone is going to love it, I get that, and I do really love it ever since I first saw it, but actually putting the deposit down is scaring the ever living hell out of me haha.
Post # 8
noms…cake: This is your ring, the only person that has to love it is you. You love it, it will show on your face that you love it, and it doesn’t matter who like or doesn’t like your ring. I know mine is different because many people don’t see iolite as a engagement ring, but you know what I love it and it makes me happy. I’ve worn it for 5 months and can see this as my lifetime ring. My husband is happy that I love it and that’s all that matters. How we like it.
Post # 9
I ring is very old fashioned (it’s an heirloom) but not very “unusual”. But I absolutely love heavily included diamonds. I had never heard the term “rustic diamond” before but I think they’re really pretty and interesting rings. The picture you posted is beautiful and something I would love to have! You’ll always have idiots like your mom that have a great reaction, but I think most people would find it really cool.
Post # 10
ann.reid.9277: so true! After twenty years I’m on my 3rd stone and 4th setting. Tastes change over time, except I’m still crazy about the guy!
Post # 11
Nope…I love my sapphire e-ring and I wouldn’t trade it for the most flawless, perfect diamond out there. The only two people who have to like your ring is you and your FI. Tell your mother that you LOVE the ring and she should be happy you are getting engaged.
Post # 12
noms…cake: That ring is so cool! I love how unusual it is!
Personally, I really wanted something different. I have a Claddagh with a ruby center stone. While the Claddagh ring has been around for a long time, not a lot of people use them as engagement rings these days, at least in the US, so I’d consider it pretty unusual. I just always thought that solitaires and clear diamonds were kind of boring for my taste. I think it’s awesome that you picked something personal that not many people have.
Post # 13
noms…cake: gorgeous! My ring has a similar hexagon setting, but not the band 🙂
and on the inclusions… I have a sapphire at home that I bought on a whim a few years ago because I HAD to have it. It’s a lighter blue color and has a hint of green and an inclusion in it that I Just thought was gorgeous.. It’s still sitting in it’s tiny box which is a shame but I need to figure out what I want it set into LOL I ended up with a diamond e-ring and I think it’s pretty eye clean and has a fantastic cut, and I love it, though originally I was against a typical diamond (that’s what my fiance wanted me to have).
I don’t think you’ll regret it, and if you do, you can always change it later.
Here is a pic of my ring… complete with the milgrain on the hexagon bezel with a bead set diamond like yours!
Post # 14
noms…cake: That diamond is so cool! I have never seen anything like that.
While I didn’t choose my e-ring (I wanted my FI to choose it), I did give him one stipulation – I did not want a diamond or diamond-simulant center stone. He chose a blue sapphire for me (one of my favourite colours) and, no, I haven’t regretted it for a second! Don’t let your mom get to you!
Post # 15
Aww I’m sorry your mom had that reaction but it only matters what you like. Another bee has a rustic rose cut diamond in a bezel setting and it is beyond gorgeous. Don’t worry about what other people think, their not the ones that have to wear it! Your ring is amazing btw! Goodluck