(Closed) before I order my invites…

posted 7 years ago in Paper
Post # 4
Member
467 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

i would only make 1 change – i would make it “invite you to share and celebrate/the wedding of their daughter” – taking out the “at” at the beginning of the 3rd line – i think it flows better that way

so:

MY DAD and MY MOM 

invite you to share and celebrate

the wedding of their daughter

 

not:

MY DAD and MY MOM 

invite you to share and celebrate

at the wedding of their daughter

Post # 5
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@Lovebird724: I agree

 

Other than that, they sound wonderful!

Post # 6
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

twenty-fourth (hyphen here, yes?)

no you do not need a hyphen here

Post # 7
Member
167 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I love the wording!

I would removed the “at” from the beginning of the third line, like the others suggested, and put replace “to” with “and” in between YOUR NAME and HIS NAME. : ) Can’t wait to see the completed invitations! YAY!

Post # 10
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I went with “to” in this part.  If you put “and” then the sentence is essentially “…invite you to share and celebrate at the wedding of their daughter MY NAME and HIS NAME…” but he’s not their daughter.

MY NAME

to (to, not and?)

HIS NAME

The topic ‘before I order my invites…’ is closed to new replies.

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