(Closed) Being a Bridezilla?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
3257 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I don’t think you’re being a bridezilla for feeling this way, but this really reminds me of a situation I had with one of my BMs. I didn’t have a Maid/Matron of Honor, but this Bridesmaid or Best Man has been my closest friend for about ten years.

Basically the same thing was happening with us; every time we talked about my wedding, it turned into her getting sappy about the fact that her boyfriend hadn’t proposed. When she really should have been getting excited for me, I was consoling her and telling her he would probably pop the question soon.

I never talked to her about it and just tried to focus on the positive parts of my wedding and my other BMs. About three weeks after the wedding, she came to visit me for a “girls’ weekend.” She had her boyfriend on speakerphone out on the deck and didn’t know I was listening; he was calling her names, screaming at her, and being really verbally abusive. She broke down and told me that he’s been abusing her and that’s why she hadn’t been getting excited about everything wedding-related.

I’m not telling you this to thread-jack, but rather to make you evaluate why you think she’s acting this way. Does her SO treat her well? How long has she been waiting? Is anything else going on in her personal life that may be causing her to act this way?

I’m not saying it’s okay for her to be so flippant about the wedding, but just consider the idea that maybe something is going on with her emotionally…

Post # 4
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Not once has she volunteered to come dress shopping, or really do any wedding shopping with me.

Why don’t you call her and ask her to come with you? That’s really not for her to ask you. I’ve always been under the impression that the bride asks people to come with her, not the other way around.

She has me contacting my other bridesmaids and friends about my bachelorette party.

How well does she know the other girls? Is she more comfortable having you do the arrangements to work around your schedule? Just ask her and she’ll probably tell you.

I’ve called her several times to get her opinions on wedding things

I wouldn’t want to get several calls either. For the most part, YOU have to do all that. Limit the calls to the “big” stuff.

maybe I shouldn’t be expecting so much??? And she hasn’t been totally horrible. She does give her opinions and is positive about a lot of things, but these few things are really bringing me down.

Yes, you’re expecting too much. She’s admittedly been helpful and positive for the most part. No one is going to be as excited about your wedding as you are.

Post # 5
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I don’t think you are being a “bridezilla,” but I also don’t think that she’s really doing anything wrong.  Did you tell her that you expected her to do these things when you asked her to be your MOH?  If not, then I honestly don’t think you should say anything to her or to anybody else.  As far as a lot of people are concerned, her only “duty” is to organize the parties and do all the bridesmaid dresses stuff – not look for your dress or at/for other wedding stuff.

If, on the other hand, you did ask her to do these things before she accepted, then you should totally talk to her!  Don’t worry about being labelled a bitchy bride if you are only calling her on the stuff she already agreed to do.

Good luck!

Post # 6
157 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I just got dong being a Maid/Matron of Honor for my BFF. I was in school and busy and barley talked to her. She would send me pics over the internet and I would respond. We would talk but not as much as we should have. I was finally done with school in May and she got married in July so thats when I was able to do more stuff. I made time to go shopping with her or she would set up a Saturday to do some wedding stuff and I would always go but she worked around my schedule and she always called and asked me about doing stuff and going dress shopping. I feel bad that I was busy but she understood and worked with my schedule. She was a laid back bride and I’m very thankful for that. Everything got done and it looked great. If she was mad she never said anything or acted mad. She said she understood I was busy and to help whenever I could. Some brides expect you to do everything and drop everything and sometimes you just cant. Goodluck and just relax and enjoy this time. I’m sure she is not doing it on purpose.

Post # 8
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I think that there is alot of emotions that come with Wedding Planning and this is no different. I understand that feeling of wanting everyone to be excited and happy for you. You are not being a Bridezilla but she is not being a bad person either


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