Post # 1
Ok my dear waiting Bees, I’ve had myself an interesting weekend..
The SO and I went away with his extended family and their friends to a remote camping ground to celebrate his aunt’s birthday. One of this other aunts and his sister introduced me as the SO’s fiancee Lol and when I corrected them and said that he hasn’t proposed yet, they said that that was just a formality and that they know that we will be getting married soon I found it all to be very sweet haha.
On the flip side, one of my best girlfriends, who has just gotten engaged herself, has called my centre stone (which I haven’t even gotten yet) fake. Twice! She had gotten a beautiful three stone white gold ring with a natural sapphire centre stone. When I confirmed that it was a natural sapphire, the rest of the convo went like this:
Her: Yeah it’s not a fake like yours 😛
Me: Hey, it’s not fake – you know it was the same chemical, optical and physical properties as a mined sapphire. My one is just made in a lab.
Her: I know, I’m just giving you crap.
We’ve known each other since we were 11 and know how to push each other’s buttons so I brushed it off. But when she did it again over lunch, explaining to another friend that we both have sapphires in our engagement rings but hers is natural whilst mine is fake, I felt a bit hurt. Sure she quickly amended it to “man made” after I again had to state that it’s not fake but made in a lab as opposed to being mined – but still I haven’t even gotten it yet and I’m already getting shit about it!
Post # 3
Ugh, I’d be annoyed too. I’m sorry!!! But congrats on being called fiancee already 🙂 It feels good, doesn’t it?
Post # 4
What a nasty thing to say! I can’t imagine what kind of friend would do that…next time she feels the need to make that distinction, which is unnecessary and rude, I would feel the need to leave.
Post # 5
Wow, that is so rude! It’s pretty sad that the only way for her to feel good about her ring is to put yours down.
Yay for being embraced by your new family! 🙂
Post # 6
@Miss Circe: I hate friends like this…
Post # 7
Ugh, that really sucks, I’m sorry she is doing that!
So excited for you proposal though! It’s so great that his family has already accepted you as part of their family!
Post # 8
If she keeps it up, I would just say something like “well I thought is was really stupid to buy the same exact thing for twice as much and ruin the environment in the process”.
Post # 10
+2! Turn her into a donkey, Circe!
Post # 13
@fvsoccer: This! On so many levels, this. Better than my response of punching her in the face.
Post # 14
@Dialysate: It does – I really had to resist the urge to start jumping up and down with glee lol
@Nona99: The thing is, she’s been one of my closest and best friends since we were 11 and we’re 25 now so that’s over half of our lives. She’s like a sister and you’re right, it was unncessary and rude and completely out of character and out of the blue. She’s seen the ring before and was always complimentary towards it until now.
@Regina Phalange: See if that’s how she’s feeling – that she needs to feel good about her ring, I just wish that she would tell me because I could give her a long list of how beautiful it is and it is actually gorgeous. Her FI did a great job choosing and surprising her with it. It suits her perfectly and I’ve told her that a few times. If she’s unhappy, then I’d be there to talk things out with her but I don’t know if that’s the case. Lol but on the good note, I am reslly grateful that his family has been so accepting
@MissComicBook: Thanks hun I find it is so awesome that they’re excited about it – his brother has even been asking me questions about when the wedding will be and his sister is already asking about babies lol
@fvsoccer:, @Kat_Kit2000:, @Sapphire-Dreamer:, @gangqinjia:, @futuremrsk18:, @amallama:
Lol well I already said something along those lines, I think after the first incident, I quipped back “At least I’m sure that the people who made my stone has health insurance”. But then I really don’t want to pursue that line of argument and make it a natural vs. lab created debate because as we’ve seen here on the Bee, it just descends into absurdity. I guess I just want to have my friend look down on something that means a lot to me.
If she brings it up again, I’m going to have to call her out on it. No punching or turning people into donkeys , but telling her firmly that we’re no longer in high school, and if she has an issue with me, I would like for her to be direct with me as opposed to making snide remarks. Because we’ve been through soo much together that we shouldn’t be resorting to that.
Post # 15
@Miss Circe: Hey – explain to hers that if yours is indeed lab made, that it’s most likely more socially responsible than your friend’s mined one. I personally prefer most lab-created bling because the practices of manufacturing and selling them tend to be more ethical. But that’s just me. I like being able to sleep at night knowing that my stuff is ethically sourced, better for the environment and conflict free. Chemically, it’s exactly the same thing.
Post # 16
Some people really don’t like synthetic gemstones, but it’s rude of her to keep mentioning it. I don’t go out of my way to criticize my friends’ choices in front of others. If she does it again I’d suggest telling her it bothers you because it seems like she’s putting down your ring with what she’s saying, and why would a good friend do that?