- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA
I have exciting news! Darling Husband and I have been having a lot of conversations lately, and he has finally decided he’s ready to TTC.
The long and short of it is: Since we’ve moved to Alaska we’ve discovered the very seasonal nature of work up here (which wasn’t much of a “discovery” since we both knew it already, but anyways)… We decided that the best option woudl be to plan for a fall or winter birth to ensure that he can be around and actually experience being a new dad while we still have a new born, instead of having to try and take time off and/or away from work during the time of year when his company is busiest.
So… That means TTC starting in December and going until May, then stopping until the next December. Seems simple enough, and I’m really excited about the possibility.
BUT… (Come on, you knew there had to be a but!)
Now that we’ve actually set a date to start, after talking about it for SOOOO long, I’m kind of freaknig out a little. I always thought I was ready. Rephrase: I always KNEW I was ready to have kids. Right up until Darling Husband said he thought he was… Now I’m filled with self doubt and thinking about all the negative ways our lives will change when we have kids, and worrying about finances and stress on our marriage, and everything. I feel like a complete basket case!
And I feel like I don’t want to say anything to Darling Husband about it because he’s only just coming around to the idea that he’s ready and if I tell him I’m all of a sudden not sure, he’ll jump squarely back into the “not yet” camp.
Has anyone been here before? Should I say something to him? Keep my mouth shut? Visit a shrink???