Best article on relationships I've read in a long time…

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
886 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I agree and disagree with some of the points.  In a perfect world yes but that’s not always the case.

Post # 4
Member
490 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Sheryl Paul is amazing, absolutely LOVE her insight. I read that blog frequently and it brings life into perspective so nicely! 

 

@discokitty:  67 days indeed! I am right there with ya!

Post # 6
Member
2073 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I love Sheryl Paul’s work. I didn’t read the article you linked, but I can only assume it’s her. I had MAJOR relationship anxiety a few months ago – couldn’t eat, sleep, work. I lost 20 pounds in just a couple of weeks. It was the most horrible, brutal experience of my life.

I found her site and it helped me IMMENSELY. I also started therapy, and medication (which I no longer take). It was believing all of those myths that had me worked up. Believing that evening questioning my choices meant I must be making the wrong one… Sooooo not true. My man is the very best, most amazing, loving person I could ever imagine spending my life with.

So glad I found her work! I’m glad it’s helpful for you too

Post # 7
Member
1696 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@discokitty:  Oh thank goodness I read this comment. Because I was about to go off on a long rant about how that is why so many relationships fail as that is what people are told to expect.

 

That was an excellent piece that I wish more people would read and take to heart.

Post # 8
Member
1768 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

That is so good. I want to print it out and give it to all of my girlfriends.

Like PP, I went through a major “HOLY CRAP I’M GETTING MARRIED AM I REALLY READY FOR THIS!” phase, but thankfully it’s all settled down. I’ve always been a pessimestic person who is resistant to change and who overthinks everything – really, I was a disaster waiting to happen. Sheryl’s website REALLY helped me. A ton.

Post # 9
Member
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Thanks for posting this. I read this article and then skimmed through her other posts and read the one about Why is Love Scary.

When I read this kind of stuff – and realize just how messed up my little brain and heart are from two parents for whom I was never good enough – I feel so bad for my poor FI.  I do things (sometimes consciously, sometimes unconsciously) to push him away because I’m afraid. I know it – but I can’t always control it or turn it around quickly enough… Poor boy. I must be exhausting…

I have my individual session with our premariagge counselor next week, and I am going to highlight some of the points from these and bring them along.

 

 

Post # 10
Member
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Amen.

Post # 11
Member
1631 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Loved every word.

Post # 12
Member
886 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@discokitty:  Ohhhhh that makes much more sense! Sorry about that haha 

Post # 14
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@discokitty:  +1

i’m kind of tired of hearing people say that because I have any doubts whatsoever that’s it, done. Will I ever not have any?? I’m the kind of person who thinks about things very thoroughly . I sometimes have doubts about my current relationship but those inner dialogues end up convincing me that the great things are worth the occasional human imperfections. That it doesn’t matter because we complement each other. We rarely disagree and bounce back reliably from stressful, frustrating, not conducive to love times. I feel like occasionally doubting leads to conscious decision making. 

That’s “one” enough for me!

you should listen to Dan Savage’s I opinion on the myth of the one. I believe it’s on YouTube. Same message, well put. 

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