Post # 1
I NEED SOME HELP!!
I’ve been with my partner for a few years and I’ve been planning on popping the question soon, I’m so excited about it! She’s my best friend and I can’t wait. She means the world to me. I’ve planned to do it when we are on holiday at a place I know she will love. We are going with some close friends, one of which is her best friend. I’d plan for it just to be us when we are away during the day together.
Couldn’t have made this up but her best friends partner called me today (great guy and a close friend of mine) and was calling to essentially ask me to take the ring as he was planning it too!!
I dont one know what to do? Do we still do it, separately when we are apart on holiday but on the same day? They are the best of friends and it could be something really special…on the other hand it could be terrible. or do we just both not to it there? I know it’s where I want to do it. If we did it on separate days, one would have to go second.
Thanukes in advance for any help!
Mr Smith 🙂
Post # 3
I think you should just continue with your plans. If he asks you to do something for his proposal that would interfere with your proposal, don’t do it. These are two separate events that don’t need to impact or change each other. Do your thing, and he’ll do his.
Post # 4
@Mr_smith: If they are really best friends I think it could be incredibly sweet if you both went off on your own for private proposals and then met back up to celebrate together! I would definitely still do it on your holiday whenever you were planning to originally and see if the other guy could do it at the same time (just not right next to each other :p)
I think you just have to think about your girlfriend though. I have some friends who would want to have their own “spotlight.” Not in a selfish way really, but they wouldn’t like to share that moment with someone else. I however wouldn’t care at all if a friend got engaged on the same day as me. Just think about what your girlfriend would want and go with that!
Post # 5
My best friend and I got engaged on the same day but on different coasts of the US, with our two fiances not realizing they both timed it. To us, both our proposals were special, but they WERE different and SEPARATE. I also don’t really care about the spotlight as I shared a wedding date with 2 other friends!
I think you should go ahead if you’ve already made plans, but make sure that they are meaningful to your partner. I also think it is important that you both go off separately to do your proposals.
Post # 6
@Mr_smith: For me and my BFF that would be AMAZING. It would be SOOOO cool to come back to the cabin or whatever and both start screaming. LOL But you know her best. Are her or her BFF competitive or the type to want the spotlight only on her? The problem with waiting would be that she might then get jealous of her BFF getting engaged first AND you might have to wait until MUCH later to get engaged.
Post # 7
- Wedding: September 2014 - Dallas, TX
I think as long as the actual proposals are separate, it would be SO FUN to get engaged at the same time as my best friend. I would do seperate proposals, and then plan a nice dinner with the other guy for the four of you to celebrate!
Post # 8
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
I would try to coordinate it so that you are both asking them at the same time but in different places. Then rendevous first thing in the morning so they can share the news with each other. The biggest concerns I would have would be: 1) the proposals are going to get compared to one another so get used to that now; and 2) if you propose after the other guy are you going to have to spend a day or two discussing why you aren’t engaged yet with your soon to be fiancee.
Post # 9
- Wedding: October 2017 - Baton Rouge, LA
After FI proposed, we started making our phone calls, and when he called HIS best friend to tell him, turned out he proposed the night before to his FI. Of course they are competitive, so its possible if my FI knew his best friend had a ring, he would have done it sooner to beat him hahah But it’s all good!
Post # 10
I would say doing it on the same day is better than waiting and getting proposed to second.. For some reason I have had friends who just don’t feel their engagement is as special when a close friend gets engaged first.
Post # 11
You know your partner best. Does she do group birthday parties, or does she need a special day to her self? How about her friend?
I would also talk to the BF’s paramore and ask him what he thinks. He might be competative as well and not like getting co-opted in his proposal.
I think it could be a cool and touching story, but I think it also could be a source of drama. Not for me, but there are a lot of girls on here who complian about cousin/aunt/BIL’s sisters bestfriend getting married in the same month as them.
Post # 12
I think it would be so fun! I wouldn’t mind at all, now instead of one reason to be excited they’ll have two!
Post # 13
I wouldn’t mind being proposed to on the same day as my best friend…I definitely wouldn’t want to be second lol. I think your plan sounds sweet.
Post # 14
@Mr_smith: Talk to your buddy about it and see what he thinks. If you were planning on doing it anyways, you should stick to your original plan!
Post # 15
@Mr_smith: Don’t co-ordinate it, don’t discuss it. Oops I just saw that you’re all on the same holiday, including the other couple.
To be honest I have a problem with that. You’re all on a group holiday, and the engagement suddenly makes the holiday about you and your gf. I’m trying to imagine how the other people will feel (not only the other almost engaged couple). I’m not sure what i think now… (I’m used to reacting to proposals, not planning them 🙂
Post # 16
I think it’d be so sweet for it to happen at the same time! However the movie Bride Wars does come to mind :/