- 5 years ago
So I have 2 close girl friends, and lately it just seems that we are unable to ever get together, even one on one. I admit I was naive and thought my life at my age now would be like Sex and the City, where despite having children and/or husbands at home we would go out to movies & dancing.
My one friend and I used to be quite the party girls, and obviously that simmered down a bit when we both got into serious relationships. I’m engaged now, and she’s recently had a baby and will be married next month. I still go out dancing and see movies with my fiance, but there are some things I would rather do with just the girls. But this one friend either says we’ll see the movie and goes with her guy, or they drink at home. I can understand the pressure she’s under, but her fiance has agreed to watch their baby if we wanted to go out. She used to always text me about doing things and now it’s me, and half the time I might as well be talking to a wall. I’m perfectly allright with just going out dancing with her and not drinking, if she’s concerned about slipping into her old ways.
My other friend, she recently got married and we’ve had wine nights at her house, but she has expressed her interest in us going shopping and hiking. She found out she had a seizure disorder so she’s been nervous about going out without her husband, who’s helped her with her last attacks. I also know they have rent & student loans to pay, so they have to watch their activities. But again, she sometimes suggests things and then I never hear back. I never want to press the issue and come across as too needy.
I understand that both of these girls are in tough situations, and they can’t easily go out and do things as I can. But it’s never been easy for me to make female friends and this is why I treasure them so much. I want both of them to be in my wedding and I worry that that will be the only time we all get to hang out. I try to arrange group outings but there seems to be a conflict always popping up.
I just don’t know how to broach the topic with them without coming across as needy or unsympathetic. I know they would both benefit from time out of the house! They might think I just do things with my fiance exclusively, like they do, but that’s only because he’s my one option at the time! I just get lonely easy and some times I really need a girl to talk to and have fun with, you know? I’ve told them half the time I’m here at home watching TV or reading, so never hesitate to text me