Best Friend's husband deploying – what can I do for her?

posted 3 years ago in Military
Post # 3
144 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Definitely breaking up the time is key.  When my boyfriend and I were long distance (about 6 months) it was always easier to have little things to look forward to, like a girl’s night, or going shopping, or little vacations.  Distracting yourself from missing your other half is the best way to deal with it, because you don’t feel so sad all the time and you have fun things to keep your spirits up.  Just let her know that if she needs to vent, you’re there.  

Post # 4
1793 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m a 26 year retired vet.  My advice is to LISTEN when she needs it.  Don’t come back with sweet little sayings that have no impact like “it will be ok”, “I know how you feel”, etc.  Sometimes you just need someone who will listen.

Do they have any family close by or are they stationed quite far away from them?  Encourage her to make time for herself a priority.  Maybe she can get a coop thing going with one of the other mom’s to babysit each other’s kids so they can have grown up time.

Send her cards every now and then.  What is her crazy, silly side?  Send her a care package now and then playing up to her silly side.  Call her.  Maybe send a little care package to their child.

Encourage her to stay busy (yes, I know exactly how stupid that sounds when she has a 2 yo, but she has to do more than just be mommy).

Above all, just listen when she needs it.  You can’t fix her problems that stem from the deployment, but you can listen.

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