Post # 1
There’s nothing we can do at this point, but I just needed to rant on an issue we just came across today. We are having a DW and the wife of the Best Man can not make the wedding (for her own personal reasons). She has told the Best Man (FBIL) that if he attends the wedding, she will leave him. She has a lot of insecurities but I just think she is being so selfish. I’ve never had issues with her before, although my FI has never gotten along with her, but this is about his best friend and brother being there for him on his big day.
MY FI is so upset and it sucks to see him hurt. He loves his little brother so much and I know how much it would mean for him to be there. At this point, the Best Man pretty much said he has to choose between the wedding or his family and of course he chooses his family. Ah well, wedding woes…
Post # 3
What the hell is wrong with that woman?? Jeez!
Post # 4
@denisi33: WHAT! His wife will leave him if he goes to his brothers wedding!? Unless she’s going in for surgery or is due to deliver their child very close to the wedding I can’t see a valid reason for such an ultimatum.
Post # 5
@MsGinkgo: Her reason is that he should be saving the money for the family and therefore if he goes, he’s choosing a “vacation” over his family.
Post # 6
Woah. Best man is one thing, but BROTHER??!?! This is nuts and just unacceptable. What a psycho. That is so sad, I’m sorry you are dealing with this.
Post # 7
@denisi33: *sigh* Some people need to get off the crazy train. Hopefully this doesn’t lead to strained relationships.
Post # 8
It’s probably a good thing that I’m not this guy, because I would see that as a dare. No one will stop me from attending my sibblings wedding.
Post # 9
@Misswhowedding: LOL, I agree. My brother is getting married next year and it’s going to be an expensive and far trip for us, but best believe I will be there no matter what.
Post # 10
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
Wow. What a stupid biatch. Your brother’s wedding isn’t a “vacation”.
I’m really sorry 🙁
Post # 11
@denisi33: By “family” do you mean wife and kids or just her? If he is leaving her at home with three kids for a long weekend, I could see her being a bit miffed that he is going on vacation without her (but the ultimatum is still insane) but if it’s just going without her…then I really don’t get it.
Post # 12
@denisi33: that blows. I would never speak to her again. #thatbitch!
Post # 13
@denisi33: Oh man. What a bummer. Especially as it seems extremely likely that their marriage won’t last (someone so insecure they can’t face their partner going to a sibling’s wedding is… troubled) and in the end he will have missed his brother’s wedding to please someone unpleasable.
That said, and as crushed as your fiance must be, I hope it won’t drive them apart. Someone married to that much of a control freak is going to need some support from his family in the years to come…
Post # 14
- Wedding: October 2014 - Greenbrier Country Club
Woah… that’s not good.
If she is going to threaten their marriage for this, he will again. and again. I see divorce in the future. Clearly the marriage is all about her.
Your FBIL needs to know that his brother, your FI, IS family.
Poor guy. She obviously has a lot of control over him. 🙁
Post # 15
@denisi33: it is a bit selfish of his wife to give him that sort of ultimatum. is she a jealous, insecure person? maybe it’s financial? i can understand that your fbil chooses his wife first. he should. i’m sure your fi would choose you over anyone or anything but still it’s a bit weird.
unfortunately, when you are having a dw, these are the things that you sign up for. not everyone will be able to attend (for whatever the reason).
are you going to have a party back at home where your fbil will be able to enjoy and celebrate your marriage?
Post # 16
@thenewmrsmax: Yes, they have 2 kids. The whole family was invited, but she is choosing not to go (personal reasons I won’t get into, but I assure you it’s not health related or any reason that deserves any pity). We love our nieces and wanted them to be there! She takes personal vacations every year so it’s all just irrational to me.