(Closed) Best Man getting deployed!

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Oh, no, that is awful! The ONLY thing that made our deployment easier was knowing we didn’t have kids. They’re so young, it’s so hard for them to understand!!! The FRG group will be good to them. They are an excellent support system.

You could buy her a webcam for a gift…then she and the kids can talk to their dad and send him videos. Those are the best =]

Post # 5
Member
340 posts
Helper bee

I’m really sorry about this news! I know how hard deployment can be my fiance is in Afganistan right now, like EJS said the FRG will be a big help. It will be a time for you and your FSIL to come together, she will be needing her friends and family. And also, kudos to you for not being a “bridezilla” and making a big deal about it concerning your wedding, it shows what a good person you are.

Post # 6
Member
815 posts
Busy bee

My thoughts are with you and your family.  I hope you and your FI are able to take this time to grow closer with the FSIL.

Post # 7
Member
340 posts
Helper bee

Oh the capital will be good. That is Kabul. Some of the largest FOBs (forward opperating bases) are there including Bagram Air Base which is the biggest in Afghanistan. It has a Burger King and everything. My fiance had to get med-evaccuated there once, nothing serious he broke a tooth.

My thoughts go out to your family!

Post # 9
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Oh, that’s good! The capital is more like a city than anything. He might even be stationed at the Embassy. He HAS to be at a base somewhere, even if he does missions in the field. And he will have internet access occassionally at the VERY least, even if he must go log in at a center. Not knowing anything is the hardest part. The only things I could count on was my 30 minute/week phone call and email. And even then, the heat caused black outs.

Is this his first deployment???

My husband was stuck at a crap hole FOB in Iraq and they had nothing. When he went to the Embassy (in Iraq), he was like “E, they have DOMINOS and ICE CREAM” and it was more “normal” than some of the crappy FOBS.

OMg, if it’s an air force base, those are the BEST. They have movie nights and bbq’s and everything. The army guys get screwed. AF has more money =]

Post # 10
Member
340 posts
Helper bee

Haha Ejs that is exactly what my fiance said when he went to Bagram. He was like “I got Pizza Hut and I signed up for a massage!!!” At his normal FOB all they have is the MWR with it’s ping pong table.

Post # 12
Member
340 posts
Helper bee

That is so sad about the kids it’s horrible when they can’t understand what is going on. You should definitely tell your FSIL to look into the FRG (I assume the Air Force has some version of the FRG which stands for Family Readiness Group) they have classes for parents and children, both before deployment and after to help the family adjust to the parent being gone. I know wives who have said these classes really help the family get through hard deployments.

Post # 14
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Yeah, good call on the classes. I took one “ready deployment class” for wives and it was really bad though. they berated us and told us not to get married right before deployment (80% divorce rate) and YOUR PLACE IS NOT IN THE BAR and don’t go out and sit by the phone, etc etc. Try telling that to a 21 year old college student. It was like being a little kid.

There are forums she might find helpful for handling her kids this time around. And herself. Afghanistan is a lot farther away! The time different is ridiculous and the communication is tougher. And i’m guessing this will be longer than 6 months, too.

I’ll brainstorm and PM you if i think of anything extra.

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