- 5 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA
The best man from my wedding (DH’s very good friend from college) is getting ready to propose to his girlfriend of about 2 years; I’ve met her a few times, she’s very sweet and we get along well. Overall, I’m very happy for them.
My concern is, DH mentioned the other night after hanging out with him, that he’s still working on saving up and is just starting shopping for “the” ring (the proposal will be a complete surprise). He’s planning on spending about $10,000. Personally, I think that’s beyond excessive, but he can afford it, and that’s really not my concern…
My concern is, with that kind of a price point, he’s likely looking at some pretty hefty rocks; and based on a few off hand comments, I’m not sure that’s the kind of jewelry his girlfriend is into. She’s not really the “bling” type, and I’ve never seen her wear anything other than elegent and understated pieces. Now, I don’t know her all that well, so I’m not sure if her comments are really based on her opinion or just her being nice; but when we’ve talked about my ring (seeing as how her SO was the bestman, we had quite a few wedding inspired conversations, but always relating to me & mine) she’s said more than once things like “I’ve always loved the smaller/simpler rings” and other things this could just be because I have a smaller/simpler ring and she was wanting to be polite… but based on the jewelry she does wear, I think it’s more than that, I really think she does prefer the simpler stuff…
So, the best man still hasn’t mentioned to me that he’s doing anything more than seriously considering it (no comments of saving, budgets, or shopping) but I’m wondering if I should throw my 2 cents in? Or just let it be.
My worry is, if he spends that kind of money, she likely would never admit to him if she doesn’t like the ring all that much, because he put so much effort & money into it. (he only makes ~$55-60k a year, so $10k is a pretty big chunk of change) He’s definitely not the kind who would take it well if she didn’t like it (not an angry response or anything, but I think he’d be super disappointed)
Would you say something to him? Would you bring it up first, or hope and wait and see if he talks about it?
We work for the same company, although we rarely see eachother, so it’s not all that improbable for us to end up eating lunch together or something.