Best way to announce elopement to Fi's family?

posted 3 years ago in Elopement
  • poll: Best way to tell them?
    Week or two before : (5 votes)
    28 %
    Day or two before, but once we are already at our destination : (1 votes)
    6 %
    When we get back : (8 votes)
    44 %
    When they get the announcement in the mail : (2 votes)
    11 %
    Other (give any other ideas in the comments if you have them) : (2 votes)
    11 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    12 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    Let them find out with everyone else. It may seem cruel but if you dont have a good realationship with them and if you think they will be snarky about it or try to bust up your day and make it about them then go do your thing and let them find out with everyone else. I’m in a similar situation and only two people will be attending. Its about you and your finace do what will make you happy 🙂 Good luck & Stay strong

    Post # 3
    Member
    1137 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Well, for me eloping is just eloping. Go, get happily married with out telling anyone and then come back and if you want, anounce it!

    If you want to tell someone, you could tell your FI’s dad. 

    Sorry you are in this situation! Smiles and hugs!

    Post # 4
    Member
    161 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    I definitely wouldn’t tell them beforehand. Based on the reaction they gave you when you announced your engagement, I would be afraid they might try to fly out and stop the wedding. Besides, your FI’s mother and sisters may try to pressure him to back out if they knew you were marrying soon. I also personally wouldn’t tell them until I got back — wouldn’t want to hear their reaction over the phone and have it possibly ruin the day. 

    Just my 2 cents. Sorry you’re having to deal with this! Just remember it’s about the two of you, no one else 🙂

    Post # 5
    Member
    1168 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    If I were you, I’d tell them after. It seems like they may tinge your plans with negative vibes, and you don’t need that. So go celebrate, get married and then when you’re home share. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    137 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I got a cool idea from the bee. Don’t tell anyone who isn’t involved beforehand. Then afterwards take a photo from one of your phones, maybe your two left hands with the rings or a sign that says you’ve eloped and text it to everyone who should know first. So, family and close friends. Then (optional, I know some people don’t like facebook/twitter etc) post the same photo on a social network so your other friends can find out.

    The only problem would be family members with phones that can’t recieve photos but a text message will still work. I am 95% sure this is what me and FI are doing.

    Post # 7
    Member
    2400 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I like the idea of sending them a picture or something shortly after the ceremony, then later posting it or mailing it for everyone else to see. HOwever, I would promptly turn off your phones after sending the pics to the family just in case they blow-up  they can’t contact either of you about it… NOrmally I would say tell them a week ahead of time, but it doesn’t sound like the best idea given what you described about the engagement… 

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