(Closed) beyond death do us part

posted 5 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Hostess
16217 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I totally understand what you’re saying. Quick question though — are you having a religious ceremony? That may affect how much you can change the wording of this part of your vows, depending on whether religious beliefs are driving the content. It could be tricky if you are having a Christian ceremony because Protestant belief is that you’re only married till death. However, your pastor can probably help you find some language that you’re more comfortable with that still reflects Christian belief.

Instead of “till death do us part,” we said, “all the days of my life.” Same meaning, essentially, but focuses on the life side of things, not death.

Post # 4
Hostess
3000 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I don’t have any real knowledge on this but I think the LDS religion pledges for “eternity”.  I’m sure they will have some good advice on what to say….Any LDS out there??

Post # 5
Member
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

You might have a hard time finding an officiant who will include any mention of your partnership after death, for a couple of reasons, but mainly because there’s a big risk that it’s a vow you cannot keep. If you die, would you want your SO to not remarry, ever?  Because that’s basically what that vow is saying.  If he/she does remarry, doesn’t that break your vow? You may be reunited in the afterlife, or you may at least believe that’s what’s going to happen, but by entering into a new relationship after one partner dies, the other partner would be technically breaking their vow.  And many officiants will not let you take a vow where they know there’s a good chance you’re going to break it.

I’d really consider the ramifications of this vow before making it.  I know that if something happened to me, I’d want DH to find a new love (after a suitable period of mourning lol) and I wouldn’t want him to feel like he was abandoning his vow to me in order to do that.

Post # 6
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

A couple of weeks back there was a thread on here about a Bee who wanted to say something similar in her vows, and the pastor who was conducting their ceremony wouldn’t allow it because it was in conflict with the theology of her belief system.

Post # 7
Member
335 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

This post totally reminds me of something I recently found and sent to my FI:

Keep us posted when you figure out the wording, I’m a ’til-death-and-beyond’ advocate as well 🙂

Post # 8
Member
122 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Could you change the ending of these vows to say “from this sday forward and forever more” or “from now and forever”? Instead of until death do us part?

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