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No, it's not strange at all.
We didn't have a "traditional" proposal. We just decided we wanted to get married and that was it! I've spoken to a number of other couples who avoided the planned, down-on-one-knee type proposal.
Don't worry about what other people will think is strange. You clearly think that this is the best way for you and your BF to get engaged. That's all that matters. Keep doing what feels right and have fun!
We didn't have a big romantic "down on one knee" proposal ... honestly I think the down on one knee things is weird and antiquated ... We took the dog for a walk like usual, sat on a bench and he asked (not for me to marry him, but if I wanted to spend the rest of our lives together) ... the story doesn't get many ooh's and aah's ... but I think that it was perfectly fitting for us.
Congratulations on your upcoming engagement. 
I don't think not having a traditional proposal is strange at all - what matters is what you (and your boyfriend) are comfortable with. If you are fine with it, then that's all that matters! To each his/her own - my FH's proposal was very low key, at home - just the way I liked it. I'm quite shy and if did a more traditional restaurant-type proposal, I probably would have been mortified (at the situation, not the proposal, LOL).
Bottom line - if it works for you, then it's fine!
A proposal doesn't have to involve getting down on one knee. I don't think it matters so long as the meaning is there which is that he is telling you he wants to take the next step and get married!! Good luck!
same here.. no big romantic, insert movie music here proposal moment for us either
we chose the ring together, actually it was more him than me because what i thought i wanted in a ring is different to what we decided on but when he picked up the ring he came home and did put it on my finger which was a nice romantic moment and then it was over as we hit the phones and visited the families
so youre not alone on this.....
I was fine with not having a proposal - I felt like my BF was under enough pressure from me, so I told him that I didn't need one. All he had to do was say "ok I'm ready" (which I had already said) and then I pictured us going to buy a ring together, and telling everyone. But he wanted to do the old-fashioned romantic thing. In the end I'm glad to have such a cute story, and I'm glad he got the chance to plan something (he also likes it bc it gives him an excuse to not get involved in wedding planning - he says he's done his part now!). I think whatever suits you as a couple is the most important thing.
I always thought I'd be okay with that too, but I am very glad (in my situation) that I got 'the' proposal. Everyone is different and if that works for you, that's the most important!
While I did not demand a "down on one knee" circus , I have to admit I'd be a little disappointed if all he did was hand me a ring. There are so many different , and private , ways to "pop the question". But personally I love surprises , so I imagine that has something to do with it.
We have a ring, but did not have a proposal. We decided to get married, set a date, a few months later - he bought a ring, it came in when he was out of town, but I waited till he came home to put it on. And that was that. It is what worked for us, and I have no regrets.
My fiance and I had talked about getting married for a while. I picked out the ring, we had begun the planning, but with no deposits. I felt bad because he got so nervous he could barely ask. I had to laugh at him (and of course say yes) because he was still nervous I wouldn't say yes. It was really cute, but I wouldn't feel bad if he didn't have to have the nerves going crazy.
Ms.Mini, your proposal story sounds just like mine!
Getting proposed to was very nice, but hardly necessary. He did it because he wanted to do it. I've heard some elaborate stories and ones like yours, Miss Summertime. With most things wedding related, if you have a problem with how other people percieve you and judge your wedding, the more traditional route is usually the safer route. If you have no issues with that, then who the hell cares what you do so long as it makes you happy?! Congrats, by the way!
We didn't really have big proposal. We had looked at rings a few months before but then talked about him not even getting me a ring and then I would just have very blingy wedding band. My birthday, Christmas, New Years, and our anniversary all passed without a ring or proposal. Then one day he took off work as a sick day to supposedly get some things to get done and to spend the day with me. We were getting ready to go to his parents and I had been joking that I wasn't going to put any of my rings on because his mom was always grabbing my hand and looking for an engagement ring. I started getting irritated because he was dawdling and acting all goofy. Finally he hands me the ring box and says I guess then you should wear this.
He didn't slip the ring on my finger, he didn't get down on one knee. I don't even think he really said Will You Marry Me. But it was still sweet and romantic and special.
My fiance really really wanted to do a full-out traditional, romantic proposal, but he needs to work a little on his planning, so it didn't really work out as such. ;) Sometimes I wish it had...but frankly, it's enough that we are engaged, and it's always fun to tell people when they ask that "I punched him, and he proposed". XD
It was kind of funny for us, we talk about getting married while he was here with me in Chile, then he "proposed" over the phone. (he hated it because we are engaged but no ring on my finger)
we will see each other about 3 to 4 months before the wedding so he said he wanted to do the "romantic surprise" proposal with ring in hand thing (even thought at that time our invitations will be ready for the mail and our wedding already planned) witch i dont really think is necessary. To me the most important thing is that both are willing to commit and spend forever together :)
My then-BF was away for work for 5 weeks. While gone, he hinted that he wanted to start looking for engagement rings. I flew to wear he was to make the long drive back and we stopped in Williamsburg, VA for some R&R. The place we stayed at was absolutely gorgeous and while at dinner the first night he said how wonderful it would be to get engaged there. So the next day we went to the jewelry store and picked out a ring. He still took me to a beautiful lake that evening to propose and it was wonderfully sweet. I would have ruined a surprise proposal anyway and I got the exact ring that I wanted.
i don't think that's strange at all, especially if it fits you as a couple! that's actually more along the lines of what i had assumed would happen with us--i told him that i would be happy to look for and /or pay for a ring when he was ready. but this weekend he told me that he wants to do it himself, the traditional way. so, apparently it will be a surprise! and honestly, i'm a little disappointed because i think it would be really fun to try on rings together ;) oh well!
We did not do a formal proposal...once we'd talked about wanting to get married it seemed kind of silly. But after we decided, he did plan a weekend to celebrate which is probably similar tot he kinds of things guys plan when they propose (though this was not a surprise). I think it's nice to have some sort of celebration, but not necessary.
I also don't have an e-ring (he bought me a solitaire sapphire pendant and matching earrings). This really confuses some people, but I refust to wear one until someone else does too.
Basically, do what makes sense to you. You'll find that there are so many expectations about what you should/should not do when getting married. YOu can't please everyone...so please yourself :)
My ex-husband proposed to me on the phone. There were many reasons our marriage ended, but that was not one of them.
This time around, I was the one to do the proposing. I did at least remember to do it in person. ;-) But I was so nervous about it, NotFroofy could see I was struggling with something, and thought maybe I was mad at her. I finally sat down next to her on the bed, and said something really articulate like, "Umm, so, what would you think of the idea of getting married?" However, she says my proposal was just fine--that my very nervousness about asking was evidence of how important she is to me.
So, I've never had the "down on one knee" thing. But to my mind, the proposal is less important than the wedding, and the wedding is less important than the marriage. So long as I get to be with NotFroofy for the rest of my life, I can do without the romantic proposal.
The impression that I have been given is that engagement has already been decided upon by most couples before the ring is even bought. Some might follow this up with all the bells and whistles of a fancy proposal but I think it really depends on the couple and neither way is more special than the other.
i definitely don't think a formal proposal is necessary...this is our:
we were at a bar (and very drunk by this time) with one of his fraternity brothers and two of my sorority sisters (we're all SUPER close) and one of my sisters (my roommate at the time) goes to me you too should just get married...so i go Mr. thisisme will you marry me? he's like no drunken proposals...so i asked him about 5 more times and then he finally said yes!
according to our friends it was really cute how addamant i was about him saying yes to me asking him to marry me...of course in the morning we talked about it and decided that we really should get married. that was feb. 8, 2008 (our 9 month anniversary) and now it's july 2, 2009 and we still haven't set a date...but i have him convinced we need to and he was happily excited about doing so...but we haven't yet! ha!
Ok, i'm going to add a little bit more to my post because it doesn't sound romantic, at all, which for all intense/purposes it's not...but i will add this: my FH and i are not drunks...we like to go out and have a few beers with our friends...8 feb 2008 was a perfect day...it was our 9 month anniversary, we were with 3 of our closest friends, at one of our fav. bars and having our fav drinks (beer, we are from wisconsin after all)...so for me, it was perfect, especially since that night while walking back to my place, it started to snow!! it was AWESOME!! :-D
I'm with 2dbride on this one.
My xh and I had the most AWFUL proposal. I'd been on call the night before and exhausted from emergency patients...drove back to his condo where I began IMMEDIATELY cooking for 15 relatives on thanksgiving..and having all of our families together FOR THE FIRST TIME on thanksgiving later that morning/day.
I almost fell asleep while making my (yea it is) yummy homemade stuffing and stirring gravy on the stove about 11 am the next day. He waits and asked me IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY and makes this huge announcement. I was so sleepy I said to him "wha huh???? can you repeat that again?" I barely remember getting engaged, were it not for the bling. I went to zzz after we had lunch.
What was irking to me about that day was when he asked me ABOUT FOUR OR FIVE OF THE RELATIVES almost YELLED out...YES!!! They answered FOR ME.
Um. NOT romantic at all.
I'll admit it, I had a private, romantic proposal on the beach, and I loved it. But I've talked to lots of people who didn't go that route, and was surprised to find out my parents were among them! They told me that "one day they just decided they should get married, and they went out and bought a ring." Voila. Married for 29 years. So everybody's different. :)
I *would* find it strange for ME. I've always thought I'd have a perfect proposal and I did. It wasn't anything out there, he didn't drop to one knee but it was amazing and so him & us. (FI proposed on the beach at sunset while on vacation.) I don't know how you get engaged without a proposal... LOL I think any proposal (all a proposal is is asking for your SO to marry you) is romantic! :) Maybe I'm weird
My BF was trying to come up with something memorable but for whatever reason, it didn't turn out fancy, but was quite romantic for us! We had dinner, walked the dogs, then he worked up to it by asking if I liked his family and if I would like to be a part of his family forever. Then he proposed with the ring that his grandmother wore!
So in a nutshell, whatever makes you two happy!
My hubs got down on his knee for one second and got up b/c he was so uncomfortable and that was perfectly fine. I would have been upset if he just handed it to me though. It was the sweet way he told me he loved me and wanted me forever and his following little 30 second long speech that meant the most. While he's always frank and candid with me about how he feels about me, something was just amazing about him opening the box and officially asking me to spend the rest of his life with him. He even forgot to ask me to marry him, he just kinda opened the box. Makes for a good story now. I think an over the top engagement would have been VERY uncharacteristic of him. But it's whatever works for you! You already know how he feels about you.
No proposal, no engagement ring here. We have a wonderful marriage and he supports me 100% in what I want to do - there is so much love that I am on cloud 9 and couldn't ask for more.
Very valuable lesson - it taught me what is really important and what isn't...
While he did get on one knee, I knew he was coming with the ring in hand, because I was with him when he bought the ring, on our six month anniversary. We were officially engaged five days later when my ring arrived. The proposal was private, and wonderful. We went out to dinner afterwards to celebrate, and it was nice to get a bit of attention, but I wouldn't have wanted that DURING the proposal!!
LOL Bellenga's story sounds like mine.
I don't think it is weird not to have the official proposal if that is what you are comfortable with too. If it were important to you then I would let him know that. How lucky for you to be able to pick out your ring and everything!
My fiance, bless his heart, did not know what to do. So what did he do? He got two other couples together at our house and they knew what was going to happen so one of the guys kept announcing he had to go SOON (hint hint) because he had to work. It was on Labor day, it was HOT to say the least....there were really bad pictures (because our guests KNEW what was going down!) of me in shorts with my hair in a ponytail and red face from the heat. It was a blurr because he did it in front of our friends and all the kids and everything. I didn't expect an audience. This, after just the night before we were discussing engagement and proposals (yeah, I knew something was up) and I had said I didn't want it in front of a group of people. I think he wanted to back out of doing it at our little get together but since everyone was there he felt like he had to since that was the reason for them being there. LOL
Even though I could not believe he did that, I don't regret the actual proposal. The way he asked was just a technicality. What matters is that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and I feel the exact same. :) As long as you know that, then that's all you need.
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So, my darling boyfriend has come a looong way on the wedding issue. At the moment I am tentatively thrilled that we have a timeline set for when we will look at rings, get engaged, etc.
Now, I will be ecstatic when and if we get engaged, no matter what. One thing I found curious, though - it came out in a conversation the other day that he is not planning on proposing. He just doesn't feel comfortable at ALL doing the romantic thing and even I have to admit I can't begin to picture him getting down on one knee and all that. Right now, the plan is that we will begin ring shopping on X date, and I guess when the ring comes in he'll hand it to me, ha ha!
So again, I personally am fine with this. Just curious, though, from the posts I see on here it seems like not proposing is just 'not done' these days. Would you guys find this strange?