Post # 1
My husband and I met 3 years ago and since the first night we met I have gained a solid 70 lbs. My husband has never once commented negatively on my weight and has always supported me in my endeavors to get things back under control (i.e. Weight Watchers, fitness classes, etc.).
Lately, I find that I have become completely anti-social unless we are hanging out with long time friends. The reason is because I am embarrassed for my husband to introduce me to his friends and co-workers since I’m so much bigger than him. I also don’t have very many “cute” clothes that fit me and am embarrassed to shop with my husband anymore because I don’t want him to see what size I am. I even get uncomfortable when he helps fold the laundry because clearly he sees my “big” clothes.
I’m afraid that if I can’t get my self confidence back my husband is going to start getting frustrated with me. We don’t go out a lot so I think it’s disappointing for him when his friends to invite us out and I’m not “in the mood”.
Anyone else bigger than their husband (and not losing the weight anytime soon) that had to learn to get over it and be comfortable with who they are now? HELP!
Post # 3
I do have my flaws that I get very insecure about and I can tell that my husband gets frustrated when they manifest in ways that make me not want to be around people (i.e. acne, puffiness, frizzy hair, etc). What helps me is having mini-goals that emphasize how strong and healthy I am. It could be as simple as being able to open my own cans, reading an intellectual book, tell a great joke. Start appreciating yourself as a whole, not as just you clothing size.
Post # 4
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
@sal5011: I haven’t gained any significant amount of weight since meeting Fiance but he’s gotten very fit since we met so I feel a little like the fat Fiance in comparison to how he’s turned things around.
That being said it sounds like your husband is a very nice, supportive guy who’s not going to get fed up with you anytime soon! I don’t think there’s any good reason you should withdraw from your friends and hubby, they’ll be a great support system for you and they’re not judging you (if they are get rid of ’em!)
Post # 5
@sal5011: I was bigger than FH when we met and he chased after me anyway! (I even joked, “I don’t date guys who are skinnier than me”) Your hubs doesn’t seem to be too bothered by it, so don’t beat yourself up.
Post # 6
@sal5011: I have the exact opposite problem. I don’t want to see longtime friends because I’m mortified of the weight I’ve gained back, but I’m okay meeting new people because hopefully the next time I see them I’ll be a little thinner. Weird? Yup
Post # 7
My SO has always been more fit than me (has a very quick metabolism and hardly any body fat) since I started dating him I’ve gained about 50 lbs (3 yrs also). I recently joined a gym and see a trainer 1-2 times a week and am paying more attention to what and how much I eat. My SO only voices that he knows I’m not 100% happy with my weight and he wants me to be healthier so we can live a long time together. I love training and have seen a small amount of results thus far which just pushes me to work out more. I really want to get to the point that we can both easily do all physical activities together.