(Closed) Birdesmaid-zilla? or am I over reacting?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
687 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Where you hoping to have them all in matching shoes? 

I’m a little confused as to which part your upset about … her email has a few weird parts! ha! 🙂

Post # 5
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

What’s the problem? You were letting them pick the shoes and you’re not happy that she picked Jimmy Choos? I wouldn’t be thrilled if she picked the EXACT same shoes (if that’s what she means) but I don’t think there’s a single problem with her picking Jimmy’s as her choice shoe, which you were already giving her the option.

Post # 6
Member
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

If you don’t want their shoes to match anyways, just let it go. If you think she’s being snarky or bragging maybe just say something back like ‘You may get whatever shoes you like, as long as their silver (or whatever color)’.. she’s probably looking for a reaction, just don’t give it to her

Post # 7
Member
13101 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

If you were planning to let them pick their own shoe, well that sounds like exactly what she is doing so what is the problem?  Having the same brand of shoe as the bride shouldn’t be an issue.

And Yes – it would be completely spiteful to now renege on your previous plan and ask them to instead purchase matching shoes.

Post # 8
Member
830 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

If you didn’t want them to match anyway then what’s the problem? She probably just wants an excuse to buy some new Choos. No one will see their shoes anyway if the dresses are floor length. I don’t see this as a big deal. Yes she’s probably a bit of an attention whore but if you’re even thinking about doing something to spite her then why is she a BM to begin with?

Post # 9
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Why on earth are people saying she’s a snarky attention whore. Jesus.

Post # 10
Member
3148 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

WAit. Does she want to buy the same shoes to match YOU on your wedding day. If so no, way, nada, and you have a right to be upset (atleast in my opinion) Shoes for the bride have almost become as much as an identity as the wedding dress these days…so no. If stopping her from doing that woul be by saying you want them to have matching dress’ then do that. I would just tell her you would like if she chose another shoe though and let them pick their own in silver.

Post # 11
Member
14317 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

How would it spite her to buy the other bms the same shoes?  You going to buy the other bms jummy choos too?

Post # 13
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think your FSIL would get along great with one of my bridesmaids! LOL, sounds like you have a great MOH too.  Thank God.

Post # 14
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

They are floor length dresses!  No one will see the shoes! 

If you are mad because you wanted to be the only one wearing Jimmy Choos than be mad, but you gave the BMs free reign to choose their shoe so you can’t get upset.  If you want to step on her toes than tell her she can’t wear Jimmy’s and than guess who’s the zilla?

Post # 15
Member
1755 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I would put it down to your SIL trying to either get a bit of attention or a clumsy attempt at bonding.  I’d email her and tell her that great minds think alike and that she should get the shoes that make her happy and that she’s right that everyone shouldn’t match.  Easier to act like she’s had a good idea rathering than bring to her attention that she’s essentially trying to fob off your plan as her idea.  Just let it go and focus on all the zillions of other wedding details 🙂

Post # 16
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

If you really want all the shoes to match then say “no jimmy choos, I’m picking the shoes and those are too expensive for everyone to purchase” in a nice way.  I’m sure she’ll understand.  I don’t think she’s trying to be an attention whore or anything, maybe she just really likes expensive shoes and wants an excuse to buy a new pair.

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