Post # 1
Our wedding is next september and we decided to have the ceremony at a local church, small church but sophisticated.
I am having trouble determining the walk down the aisle and if or who will give me away. My father passed away 7 months ago and I am having trouble determining who should walk with me if anyone. My brother is a groomsman and I am thinking of going on my own as I don not feel I can have someone else to this honor and do not want to try to “replace” my fathers place.
Any ideas on how to incorporate my father in the wedding without making it into a sad moment and focusing on his passing? We have also thought of having a slide show at the reception of him and I to bring him into and part of the wedding but again do not want to turn it into a depressing moment.
For favors we are thinking of doing a small bag of candy or a type of planting seeds and a donation in his honor.
Post # 3
That’s very sweet…I think your ideas for how to incorporate your dad into the day are right on target. A slideshow might be hard to watch, since you may find you’re really emotional at your reception, following speeches and whatnot. If it’s something you really want to do, it would be nice to see a slideshow of your dad holding you as a baby, etc. as you matured. That being said, I feel emotional just writing this, so I think it would depend on how you think you’ll do?
I’ve read of other brides who have their mothers walk down the aisle with them, or walk themselves. I just wanted to point out you could still have your brother walk you down the aisle before joining the rest of the groomsmen at the top of the aisle, that would be really sweet to see if you’re into it.
Good luck 🙂
Post # 4
I’m so sorry to hear that, *hugs* to you!
What if you walked in on your own, but with your bouquet and one loose flower. When you walk up, first stop by where your father would have been sitting, put the flower in his seat and then proceed up to the altar? I think that would be touching!
Post # 5
I’m sorry for your loss. You have a while to make this decision. If you are still feeling torn about it right now, why not give yourself a few months to think about it. Just act as if you will be walking yourself down the aisle, and if you feel differently later you can ask your brother.
I have seen framed pictures and candles, notes in the program, and prayers said during the ceremony. You could toast him after the speeches, as well. I think as long as you keep the moment brief, and focus on the joy of his life, it won’t be depressing. Life has beginnings and endings, remembering that makes each event more poignant.
Post # 6
Thanks for the ideas, I will def take them into consideration. I am not really felling the whole thing with my brother walking me down as we have drifted apart over the past few months due to other things but we are working on fixing that. He also is getting married next year (engaged after me but getting married before me and it is causing family issues from those out of town not being able to afford 2 travel to 2 weddings out of town for them and they wont go to 1 and not the other) oh well its a work in progress… : its a lot to type and is getting away from my original point.
I sure miss my father and wonder if things would have gotten this out of control if he was here or if some of it is just how each of us are handling it and taking out empotions on certain things.