- 6 years ago
- Wedding: May 2012
My FI and I have 7 children between the 2 of us. Right now I wish it was like it was in the beginning. We had a schedule, we got to see all of them on the same weekend. I loved my big family. I still love my big family, even more than I did then. His kids have permanent places in my heart.
About 3.5 years ago some crud went down and we had to sadly move our oldest son (has serious mental health issues) out of our home. I didn’t want to do it at all but for his own good(avoid jail) and the safety of the other kids and my business, it had to be done. FI’s daughter’s mother cut off all contact with usfor 5 mos and has been a complete pain in the rear for the past 3.5 years. We have bent over backwards to make her happy and I am just over it! FI has a hard time finding his fight anymore, he’s emotionally exhausted. What happened was not our fault and we are both sick of being punished. Not to mention the hurt it causes all our children, DD included. She thinks her Dad doesn’t contact her when in fact her Mom blocks contact for months by ignoring him. It is normally after she gives in some and lets her go camping with us or for a full day of holiday celebrations. I find it really odd since nothing bad has happened and she loves our friends and my family.
So our wedding is approx. 2 months away. The Mom has known about the wedding for 1 year. She is on FI’s FB so she knows about all our planning, where it is, what time and all that jazz. We have in no way kept anything a secret. So it comes time to get dresses for the girls, she says they haven’t talked about it. I know they talked about it a year ago because she said I threw it up in her face? Whatever I let her know what day it was scheduled and that was it. S FI has been calling and texting over and over, she refuses to answer back in any way. I am willing to be beyond accommodating, her and or her parents are invited to attend, there is no pressure for them to attend the reception. We waited many years to get married, we have made it through things with the kids that would have ripped many couples apart. We want to join together as a family, not just the 2 of us.
I know the only real advice to give us is to get a lawyer. I am mostly just venting I guess. FI is scared of the woman she always holds his daughter over him. He worries the lawyering up will start WWIII. I say the Law and the fact that we have gone to and offered family counseling for her, asked to attend her therapy appts, our offers of girl only(besides Daddy) weekends, got MORE therapy for and moved a child out is on our side.
Damn the Brady Bunch for making this look easy! I personally think it could be easy if everyone grew up and did what is best for the kids and quit using them against each other, it disgusts me.