Post # 1
Both my fiance and I were raised Catholic, but for various reasons, are planning on having a civil ceremony with my sister as the officiant (she will be deputized for the day through the County Clerk, as is allowed in California). Not to our surprise, both our mothers are somewhat up-in-arms about the non-religiousness of the event, and I personally would like to make an effort to appease their conservatism (without caving against our own beliefs).
My question is: Does anyone know of Catholic (or Jesuit) priests in the San Diego area that will provide a blessing during our wedding ceremony? I’m hoping for someone that can perform an opening and/or closing prayer during the ceremony, but I still want my sister to do the actual vows. We are planning on everything at the Japanese Friendship Garden next Summer.
Post # 3
You might have a hard time with this one. As you probably already know, the Catholic church only allows weddings to take place in the actual church and won’t allow priests to officiate at weddings elsewhere. I know you don’t want him to officiate, but asking a priest to attend and offer a blessing puts him in the position of participating in a wedding that goes against what his Church teaches – from a theological standpoint, it makes him complicit in a sin. You might find a priest who is willing to do this, but many will not.
Post # 4
Yes, I suspected as much, but am optimistic.
One of my other sisters (I have quite a few!) got married outside of the US, but was able to find a Jesuit priest (from the US) who was happy to provide a ceremony in an outdoor venue for them there. Though he did the full vows and everything, it was technically only a blessing.
Since we are planning on a Friday night ceremony, we would also consider a short Catholic wedding the following Saturday morning with only immediate family in attendance. However, we would prefer the aforementioned scenario, if possible. We want to acknowledge their beliefs/traditions without compromising our own.
Post # 5
“Catholic (or Jesuit) priests”
BAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! That is so funny you don’t even realize!!!
Post # 6
Post # 7
@thebossofyou – you’re awesome. thanks for the links!
@joy2011 I added Jesuit because that’s what my sister’s priest was specifically, and they are known to be more liberal than Roman Catholics.
Post # 8
It sounds like these guys will work out for what you are looking for. For any other Bees who might be reading this thread and looking for something, though, a couple of important points of clarification:
– the “American Catholic Church” (frmartindeporres link) is not the same thing as the Roman Catholic Church (i.e. the “Catholic Church” that most people mean when they use that term)
– the priests on the padrejoe site do not appear to be affiliated with a specific church, order, diocese or bishop, and so I can’t 100% guarantee, but I don’t think they are fully within the Roman Catholic Church either. For Bees seeking a valid, sacramental Catholic marriage, it’s important to know this.
– the Jesuits, while they have the reputation of being more liberal within the Church, ARE Roman Catholics.
Post # 9
@chiopluschris: A Jesuit priest IS Roman Catholic.
Post # 10
@Alexbrun: Not always! 🙂
To be fair, I mean that Jesuit priests are Catholic, but some are disobedient to the Church.