Post # 1
My FI and I got blocked on FB by his aunt today. I know we were blocked because other members of his family/friends can still see her profile and posts.
She received her invite to our wedding about 3 weeks ago.
She has not spoken to my FI or I since the engagement last summer, and now I’m questioning if we were in the wrong. Her boyfriend is a jeweler, but they live on the other side of the country (we’re in NY; they’re outside of Las Vegas). It really wasn’t plausible for my FI to get my ring from her boyfriend; particularly when my family has a local jeweler who I’ve known my entire life.
Not to mention, she and her boyfriend have a rocky relationship to say the least, in their five years together I think they’ve broken up half a dozen times. He also has several Yelp reviews from shoppers accusing him of ripping them off. Finally, my FI had only met himin person once before the proposal so we didn’t feel like we needed to go through him.
I really think she blocked us because she’s still mad about the ring. I am stressing about this majorly because my FI’s mom is very close to her sister and will be very upset if she doesn’t attend – which I highly suspect will be in the case.
Were we in the wrong to not get the ring from her boyfriend? When it comes to sizing, fitting, seeing the ring in person, etc. it really only made sense to go with someone local.
Post # 2
No. Your aunt is having a passive aggressive tantrum. I would ignore it and if it comes up say “oh I didn’t even notice”.
Post # 3
michelleh12 : Uh, no. You’re under absolutely no obligation to send your custom to a adjunct family member 3/4 of a continent away.
And she should have the maturity to talk to FI about it if she’s that upset and not resort to middle-school social media revenge tactics.
Post # 4
HappySky7 : Thanks for your response. Since it was her boyfriend and not her husband, we really didn’t think it would be a big deal to go to my local jeweler…..apparently it was.
Post # 5
You’re not obligated to go to an aunt’s boyfriend for anything. It is ridiculous that she even expected you to.
Post # 6
michelleh12 : I wouldn’t have bought from them if they were on the next block personally. Business and family don’t mix.
Post # 7
michelleh12 : Please don’t let yourself think like that. Youre not obligated to buy your ring from a family member, friend etc.
I feel that is an overeaction on her part, are you sure there isn’t anything else she would be upset over?
Regardless, if she’s being petty, I wouldnt let her get to you. You and your FI did your part and invited her to your wedding. Whether she decides to attend or not, is ultimately up to her and should affect you in any way.
Hopefully, she will come around and stop being childish.
Post # 8
That’s a huge overreaction on her part, you really did nothing wrong. I’d forget about it if I were you… Seems like something she needs to work out on her own.
Post # 9
It could be anything – it’s a stretch to think that it’s the ring. Maybe she’s been helping plan a shower and didn’t want you to see her facebook posts, maybe she got tired of some other posts (ie. politics, inspirational quotes etc), maybe she’s not facebook savy and accidentally put you two in a seperate group than the ones her posts are visible to
Post # 10
michelleh12 : It is beyond petty for her to be upset about something like that. This isn’t an uncle he’s known all his life- it’s her boyfriend he met once. It isn’t a shop that’s around the corner- it’s across the country. This is so dumb and if she’s blocking you based on that alone I would hope your FMIL would see how childish and ridiculous her sister is being and not get upset with you two.
Post # 11
michelleh12 : Even if it were her husband I still wouldn’t have gotten the ring from them. There is something to be said about trying it on, seeing it, feeling it.
Let her have her temper tantrum and ignore her. She’s being stupid for carrying on in such a manner.
Post # 12
Thank you all for the responses. I was worrying that perhaps we did something wrong by not considering him as a vendor. I am fairly certain this was the main problem. Her behavior towards us changed drastically after the engagement. She used to call my FI frequently and has not called him once since this occurred; after we called to tell her about the engagement she has not communicated with us.
She did come back to NY at Christmas. She made sure to hug us in full view of FI mom (her sister) but the second she walked out of the room, it was like a light switch flipped! She would not answer our questions and would look the other direction when we’d try and make conversation with her. When we parted ways, she met our hug attempts with hand shakes. She has dutifully called my fiancé on his birthday every year since he was born, this year in June he received no call and I know it hurt his feelings.
The only other thing I can think of. Three weeks ago my cousin got married in Vegas. It was a last minute wedding (we didn’t receive our invite until two weeks before the wedding; the bride picked out her bridesmaids dresses five days before the big day, they didn’t find a DJ until the day of the wedding, etc.) I asked my FI if we should call his aunt but because we were fully booked (no spare time on the trip) and given her recent behavior, he decided against it. Maybe that was the tipping point that broke the cows back?
Post # 13
Not at all!! If you own a business, you can’t take things personally. People are free to choose any jeweler they want to use.
Post # 14
This is one of those posts where I just roll my eyes.
I’m sorry to come across as insensitive, but really. She’s blocked you on FB. What age are you all?
If she has a problem with you for any reason, she should be talking to you about it. If she’s so petty and dramatic that this is her way of dealing with it then why would you want to even think about it?
I’m sure you both have better/more important things to be worrying about than her childish behaviour. Stop wasting your energy, she’ll come round.
Post # 15
michelleh12 : Does she live in Vegas? Even if it was the trip that still doesn’t excuse her behavior. Blocking someone on Facebook is an incredibly immature and poor way to deal with any hurt feelings she may have for whatever reason.