Weddingbee boards

Originally I had 6 bridesmaids and I am now down to 4! I feel so horrible about it. The first to drop was my cousin. And I fully beleive she dropped because I wouldn't let her pick her own dress. And pretty much handled it in a very very bad way, and didn't bother telling me until AFTER I emailed her and I fully beleive she wouldn't have told me until when she showed up in my hometown for the wedding. She had ample opprotunity, she has both of my phone numbers, talks to my mom every wk (I live at home), and she has all of my email addresses.

My friend recently dropped because "she didn't have the money". Yes I would have understood that had it not went down like this..... 12wks before our wedding she texts me that she forgot to order the dress. So I email the place that I found the dresses and find out that it is now going to run the dress up to about $200 (A LOT of money for a college student), even though originally I could get the dress for 40% off! She then decides to drop because she found her wedding dress... now I'm pissed off because she's known me for 9yrs. Has been promised to be in my wedding for over a yr now and has only been with this guy (who is recently divorced and only 19) for few months. So within a yr this guy will have been married, divorced, engaged and remarried. Now she's like "Help me!" So even though she's dropped from my wedding she wants me to practically plan hers. I'm so angry because this is not the first time she's chosen me over a guy and she blamed me about 2yrs ago for her addiction to cocaine, because i didn't stop her. I don't know what to do... Should I help her or not? I love weddings so thats why I want to help her. I don't want to because it makes me feel worthless that she dropped... like i'm only a filler until something/someone better comes along.  This is going to sound so wierd, but anyone else I would have dropped them out of my life like a hot rock.. but beause it's her I just can't manage to. I love her, but definately do not like her more then 50% of the time.

She doesn't sound like a very good friend. The friendship in general doesn't sound healthy despite all the things she pulled throughout your wedding. If you don't want to help her then don't.  I have a feeling that she's the type that if you were to do something she didn't like in the planning she would accuse you of trying to get back at her for what she did during yours. Save yourself some drama and go as a guest if at all.