(Closed) BM Feuds

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1565 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I would meet with the two of them and tell them: “look, it’s ok if you don’t like each other, but for me and my wedding sake, dont be nasty with each other. If you both love me, be nice and don’t sabotage each other, thanks :D”

Or something like that

Post # 5
Member
1019 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Anamagana:  +1

This is the reason I don’t like girls sometimes.. jealousy. one of my BMs hates like EVERY other girl in my bridal party… not fun 🙁

Post # 6
Member
32 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I have the same issue. I asked my best friend, who has been my best friend since we were 16 to be my MOH and she HATES all the other girls in my party and would always say really negative comments about them to me. I continued to brush it off. Then when I asked my 5th and final girl to be a BM, my MOH sent me a facebook message (of all things) freaking saying she wouldn’t be in the wedding if this other girl was. I was so tired of hearing her complain about MY wedding party at that point in time, I didn’t care and we have not spoken since.

It ruins the experience for the bride when BMS can’t get along, and it’s truly sad how many BMS are selfish and will not put personal issues aside for YOUR big day. Most of my bms were honoured that I asked them and did not care about some differences they had with each other, but my moh (or I guess, ex moh now) decided her feelings meant more than mine even though it really shouldn’t concern her.

You need to sit them both down and explain this is your one big day, that you are investing both a lot of time, money, and emotions into and you would like them to put their differences aside for you for this one day, and explain how much they both mean to you and how much it means to you in general that your wedding day isn’t compromised by whatever diffrences they may have.

Post # 7
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I have to say this is one of the many reasons why I only have one BM – my sister.  We could have a stinking row the morning of the wedding, and be absolutely fine an hour later.

2 weddings in the last coupe of years I have been to of very close friends (but not in the bridal party) have had serious in-fighting between the BMs and I just would not put up with it.  A lot of it is jealousy – who knows the bride better etc etc, but, dear God we’re adults not bloddy children!

I’d tell them to behave or be welcome as a guest to the wedding but not a part of the bridal party.

Post # 8
Member
507 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Honestly they sound like they are acting immature. All you can do is ask them to try and behave but don’t expect them to. If they hate each other that much they aren’t going to stop because you ask them to. All you can hope is they will be considerate enough to keep it out of your sight/wedding. 

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