Post # 1
So.. One of my bridesmaids is know for being pretty irresponsible.. But regardless,
We have been friends since childhood and I’ll always love her like a sister no matter
How much she pisses me off.
She has plenty of money to buy the bridesmaid dress.. She’s the one who fell in love with it and picked it out.. She’s just really bad about doing things on time simply because she just doesn’t really care about people… I just thought she would atleast care about my wedding.
I gave her and my Maid/Matron of Honor a link to order the dress 3 months ago. My moh (who is a broke college student) bought the dress with no problems but I had to (what felt like ) nag and nag at my bridesbridesmaid to get her dress ordered. 3 weeks ago I asked her about the dress and she
Told me that she ordered it… Well it’s 4 weeks until the wedding and I went ahead and called the dress company today to check on it… Surprise, there was no order for her and that dress hadn’t been purchased since my Maid/Matron of Honor bought hers. I texted my Bridesmaid or Best Man to ask about the dress ( nomentioning that I had already called the dress company) and she never replied.
Ugh.. What to do now? I don’t want to be a Naggy bride but seriously, get with the program! 🙁
Post # 3
ask her what she is planning on wearing to the wedding?
Post # 4
Wow that’s lame!
Tell her you got a call about MOHs dress and while on the line checked the status of hers to see when it would arrive. Tell her they showed no record of her dress and that she should follow up in case there’s an issue. Then see if she confesses,either way you can then ask what she plans to do if it isnt here on time….
Post # 5
@SupermansSweetheart: Agreed! That’s a nice way to do it.
Post # 6
@julies1949: Yeah, I guess I should just call her out on it.
She Looooved the dress, and she is pretty wealthy so she has no excuse not to have bought it, and it’s not fair to my Maid/Matron of Honor that spent a bunch on this dress way ahead of time when she works really hard to make her money as a waitress (The other Bridesmaid or Best Man has alot of family money) I guess I am having a hard time grasping the fact that she could care so little.. I was her Bridesmaid or Best Man last year at her wedding (which ended up being for her 4 month long marriage ) and I did everything I could do to help her with her wedding. Ugh! 🙁
Post # 7
Still, I’m confused. You said she was just like this, then you said you feel like she doesn’t care about you. Try not to take it personal. It sounds like there’s not enough time for hurt feelings, just figure out your next step.
Post # 8
@SupermansSweetheart: Good point! I’ll seem less crazy that way haha
On that note.. Of she didn’t order it like she claimed she did.. It won’t be here in time for the wedding, I seriously feel like that’s a slap in the face considering that I have already bought her new high heels to wear and had them shipped to her house, bought her a clutch purse, and accessories, along with other Bridesmaid or Best Man gifts.
Post # 9
@samjones: It’s really unfortunate, but people don’t always reciprocate the respect or other things you give them. Weddings can sometimes bring out the worst characteristics of someone in full force.
I would do as PPs suggested and just mention to her that you know she hasn’t ordered it and see what her plan is? It’s got to be dealt with. I’m sorry you’re in this situation.
Post # 10
@AlwaysSunny: She’s been like this for awhile, I just thought it would be different since its for my wedding and we are best friends.. I’m trying not to take things personally but it’s hard not to feel hurt after I am going out of my way to make sure she loved the dress, and buying her stuff to wear with it. I think it would be different if she genuinely seemed to care but she agreed to be part of this day as a bridesmaid and hasnt attempted to help at all ( not that she has to) but I just expected more from her… Both of them actually, it’s 4 weeks away and neither one has mentioned a shower or bachelorette party either.
Post # 11
Well, i think it’s too late to beat around the bush, i mean it’s your wedding! Just call her out and find out what happened, then try to figure out a solution.
Post # 12
Could she have ordered it elsewhere?
Post # 13
@samjones: i hate to say this but do you think she’s having second thoughts about being a bm? you said that she got separated recently, is she having a hard time dealing with a wedding?
definitely ask her about the dress. if she has not ordered it, ask her if she is still interested in being your bm? you never know what’s going on in someone’s head unless you ask.
Post # 14
@mypinkshoes: I agree- good luck OP, keep us updated what happens.
Post # 15
@mypinkshoes: I agree
OP i think you just need to be direct and get to the bottom of this as kindly as possible.. I know this is frustrating and upsetting but if she is having a hard time, she will open up with kindness over anger.
Post # 16
@mypinkshoes: i was thinking the same thing :/
frustrating either way, OP! i second SupermansSweetheart‘s approach rather than just calling her out on it directl. it might light a fire under her ass and could avoid drama.