Post # 1
The bride is wanting to do a happy hour and then go to the chippendales show but one of the BMs asked if it was okay she just went to happy hour because she doesn’t feel comfortable going to the show and I thought that was okay but what do you ladies think? Doesn she really have to go?
Post # 3
I think it’s ok if she doesn’t go. If she’s not going to be comfortable and have a good time why force her to go and be miserable and bring others down?
I’d say let her do what she wants.
Post # 4
@dessilove: She doesn’t have to go if she doesn’t feel comfortable. Totally understandable! Besides, she wouldn’t be much fun if she did go, because she wouldn’t really be into it.
Post # 5
She shouldn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to. I would have done the same thing she is doing. I’d tell her that’s fine.
Post # 6
@dessilove: It is completely understandable and okay for a bridesmaid to opt out of a portion of a bachelorette party she is uncomfortable with, especially if it involves something of an erotic nature.
Post # 7
It’s not a rule that BMs have to go to any pre-wedding event. If she is uncomfortable, either find something else to do or don’t worry about it.
Post # 8
I think it’s fine that she doesn’t go. I’m sure the bride would understand, if she knows her friend. It’s nice that she can at least be a part of the evening in some way.
Post # 10
I would opt out of it too, seeing as DH and I have a no-stripper agreement. Maybe it’s something between her and her SO?
Post # 11
Of course it’s okay if she only wants to go for the happy hour! Nobody should be forced to do something they may not be comfortable with!
Post # 12
No not at all! If she’s uncomfortable don’t make her go.
My bachelorette party is this weekend and one of my BMs can’t make it because she just gave birth last weekend. As far as I’m concerned, she’s definitely not expected to do anything other than take care of her new little man right now.
Basically the only event that any bridesmaid has to attend is the wedding – everything else is optional.
Post # 13
I think its fine, mainly because I wouldn’t want to go either.
Agreeing to be someone’s BM doesn’t automatically mean you have to do things you wouldn’t otherwise do. I wouldn’t want to go, but that’s not out of potential discomfort, its because it doesn’t sound fun..
To my knowledge there’s no rule that you must jump when the bride says jump.
Post # 14
I don’t think she obligated to go if she is not comfortable.
Post # 15
@dessilove: No one on this planet is required to go watch a bunch of hairless, greased up dancers swing their tally whackers around to music.
Post # 16
As you read here often, an invitation, even to a wedding, is not a summons. The only commitment a BM has made is to show up at the wedding, and if possible, the rehearsal. She only needs to RSVP yes or no to a bachelorette party invitation. She doesn’t have to justify her reasons, which may or may not be personal, to anyone.