BM/GM gets a +1?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
1406 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Haruyou:  Yes, it is pretty standard that the members of the bridal party receive a plus one.

Post # 3
36 posts
  • Wedding: August 2013

Haruyou:  I had a small wedding. We aimed for 50 or less but ended up with 64 or so. I knew that I wanted all my bridesmaids and groomsmen to have +1s because they were spending time and money on us and I wanted them to have fun at our wedding.. meaning having their SOs with them. I didn’t have a head table and didn’t force them to sit away from their dates. I knew they would want to be with their SOs anyway. If you’re having dancing, having ppl and their SOs there definitely livens up the atmosphere a lot. Makes for better pictures!


Post # 7
357 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

If they have SOs you have to invite them. If they are truly single, I do not think you have to give them a +1, wedding party or not. A +1 and an SO are different things, though. Only actually single guests get +1s. A person in a relationship gets their SO invited by name.

My truly single wedding party members did not get +1s but all spouses/boyfriends/wives/girlfriends/etc were invited.

Post # 5
588 posts
Busy bee

Haruyou:  +1s are expected where I’m from. Sure, they won’t be with them during the ceremony, but if you’re having a reception afterwards, having your SO is a lot more fun.

Post # 6
7929 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

According to traditional etiquette, no one gets a +1. Any dates that need to be invited should be invited by name at their own address. Your bridal party members should have any long term partner invited just as with any other guest.

Post # 8
1437 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

If they are married or have a serious, long-term partner (I’d say 1+ year, or if they live together, etc), then you should invite that person by name on the invitation. If not, it’s at your discretion whether or not they receive a +1.

Post # 9
11607 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Yes, by modern etiquette standards, they should get a plus one.  If they are in a relationship, then absolutely they should have a plus one. I would be miffed if I were a bridesmaid or a groomsmen and not offered the opportunity to bring a plus one, after all the effort I’d put into a wedding (showers, bachelorette, gifts, attire, possible travel, etc).

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 7 months ago by  JiminyCricket.
Post # 10
2209 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

abbie017:  What Abbie said.  Your attendants are putting a lot of time and money into your day and it’s a small courtesy to allow them to bring a date, regardless of whether they’re in a relationship or not.

Post # 11
744 posts
Busy bee

I was a bridesmaid in two weddings a couple years ago (when I was single) and basically didn’t know anyone at the wedding, but I was so tied up with bridesmaid stuff that I was glad I didn’t have a +1 tagging along!  If I had a SO at the time I would have brought him, but it actually worked out better that I was on my own.

Post # 15
605 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

None of my bridesmaids are in a relationship and all of their friends are already going to be at the wedding, so I’m not giving them +1’s. You know your friends and you family better than the rest of us. I say it’s up to you.

Post # 13
588 posts
Busy bee

Haruyou:  What is included in the 4 hours? Is it just one long ceremony? Is there a meal? Is it sit-down or standing (finger food)? Is there dancing after the meal?

Post # 14
6964 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Yes they should get a +1.

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