Post # 1
I have always hated the traditional bouquet toss at weddings, because I was always the oldest single female, in a group with all the young flower girl-aged girls. I always swore that I would never do that at my own wedding. Now I’m engaged, and I’m looking at traditions and such, and also looking over my guest list of mostly married women. Do I HAVE to have a bouquet toss, even though I hated it so much myself? And what about the garter throw? Those same men are married to the woman who won’t be out at my bouquet toss. Can we just skip that tradition altogether?
Post # 3
you can totally skip. my friend getting married later this month is tossing the bouquet but not doing the garter thing. i hope to avoid the bouquet toss. i mean, i’ll be attending the wedding with my Boyfriend or Best Friend but it’s just awkward to me
Post # 4
- Wedding: September 2013 - B&B
I vote skip it if it makes you uncomfortable! I am, actually. Also, think about the demographics of your guests. Will you have lots of younger, single ladies who would get into the spirit? From your post it sort of sounds like you won’t. I went to a wedding where hardly anyone was out to catch either. A nine or ten year old girl ended up catching the bouquet. A man in his like, late 20’s or early 30’s didn’t see who caught the bouquet and caught the garter. And then was so embarrassed that he flung himself across the floor to catch it! And obviously, they couldn’t do anything with either afterward.
There are more options out there. I was originally thinking I would give the bouquet to the longest married couple (maybe have a slow dance and eliminate younger couples until one is left?) but then I went with a brooch bouquet. That thing is staying with me! Haha.
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
We skipped it. It’s not required. No one missed it.
Post # 6
If you hate it, skip it! I’m not doing it because I hate singling people out like that.
Post # 7
I’m not doing ANY of that stuff. And yes, there will be single women at my wedding. There are no “have to’s” with stuff like that. Your reception should be exactly what you want it to be.
Post # 8
You can absolutely skip it and you don’t even really “need” to put something in its place. Lots of couples use that to indicate the end of the reception is drawing near, but you can pick a song that gets that message across (“Enjoy Yourself” by The Specials is one) or make a big Thanks For Coming speech whilst cutting the cake.
Post # 9
I’ve read about the anniversary dance, but my maternal grandfather and my step-paternal grandmother both lost their spouses in the past couple of years, so I don’t really want to point that fact out that they WOULD’VE been the longest married couple, if their spouse hadn’t died. Any other traditions I should put in it’s place? or just keep dancing/eating? Saving $30 for a toss bouquet is nice, too 🙂
Post # 10
we did both bouqet toss /garter toss and aniversry dance and was very surprised who won it. there was a couple who been to gether 58 years… we thought it was gonna go to my grooms oldest uncle and aunt or a close family friend.. i dont know any traditions to put in place of these two things.
Post # 11
I skipped it. I always hated it and all the single ladies there were in awkward situations (almost-divorced, just started dating, been dating for way too long, etc).
Post # 12
Of course you can!! I don’t think I’ve been to more than one wedding out of 12 in the last few years that had a bouquet toss. We certainly didn’t have one, nor did we have anything to “replace” it.
Post # 13
you could do the newlywed game! i’ve seen this done at a few weddings and its tons of fun.
Post # 14
I had no plans to do it, for the same reasons. But then, as I was about to leave, 3 single girls asked me if I was doing the toss. They looked crushed that I wasn’t going to. I looked at my bouquet and thought, why not? So I tossed it, one caught it, they all laughed. It was nice.
Post # 15
I didn’t do either – I always hated being out there as a single girl, and the garter thing always made me cringe to watch at weddings. You don’t have to do anything to replace them, although I did do an anniversary dance because my florist gave us a free toss bouquet. It was nice to get everyone on the dance floor too, got some cute pics of all the married couples.
Post # 16
We didn’t want either of the bouquet or garter toss…until I thought of asking both men and women to the floor for the bouquet toss. People were hesitant but our dj got on the mic and looked at me and said “Start naming names!” So I did and 1 by 1 all the singles (our definition is not married) came to the floor. I also decided to throw loose flowers (but it looked like a bouquet in my hand) so they would scatter in the air and everyone could get one. It turned out great and everyone loved it!
I am sure you can skip it…but I thought this was a neat way to honor both men and women.