Post # 1
So i have a weird kind of feeling about this and i’d love to hear some thoughts.
My BF is coming to visit me ths week. Its been a month since i last saw him as he’s currently living 16 hours away and i’m absolutaly excited to see him! When ivisited him last time, we had a serious chat about rings, getting married etc etc.
The last couple of days he’s been acting really weird. Not in a particularly bad way, just really weird. He’s been really stressed out with his job and feeling lonely being so far away from everyone he knows and so i’ve had to be really reassuring this week in our chats. Today he texted me saying he wanted to talk to me about this weekend, and once we got around to it, he was just saying that he wanted to see if it’d be ok if we didnt go out much as money’s kind of tight as he just spent $200 getting his car fixed.
He’s been talking about going out to our favourite places to eat for weeks now, and i’m not sure why the sudden change of heart. Its not an issue for me at all – i love to cook (and he’s a great sous chef), but he’s never been this tight about money before – and he’s never had so few expenses before – cheap rent, big salary etc. I’m not sure why spending $200 getting his car fixed would be causing so much of a concern for him – he’s been so budget focussed lately and we’ve had a number of discussions about finances, i’m just not sure where it is coming from.
I want to believe that he’s recently purchsed something shiny for my left hand, but i also don’t want to get too excited by the prospect. Has anyone had any similar experiences with their SO getting suddenly really budget concerned?
For the record – neither of us are loose with money, we’re both very good at saving so being budget consious isnt uncommon – but he’s talking about a $6 burger at our favourite burger place.
Post # 4
Sounds like he purchased or is saving for something big (or small but expensive)!! Keep us posted 🙂
Post # 5
He might not have bought anything yet, but he could be thinking about it – hence saving every dollar so he’s ready when the time comes. Definitely keep us posted!
Post # 6
I noticed my SO limited his spending a few months ago, then I accidentally opened his email account and saw an e-ring receipt last week, so I suspect your man may have done (or is planning to do) the same. Hang in there! 😉
Post # 7
I’m sorry for being a Debbie Downer here, but maybe he needs to save money because he’s traveling 16 hours to see you, just paid a $200 to get his car fixed and has been stressed lately, so he he just wants to lay low and hang out with you? As you said, he’s an excellent sous chef. I don’t think you should read into it too much.
Post # 8
If you’ve really been talking, I’d say he’s at least looked at how much a ring costs. My husband and I both have good jobs (we’re both automotive engineers). But he’ll tell anyone who will listen how “poor” he is. He scrimps and saves and gets mad every time I leave a light on in a different room or spend $10 to get some photos printed (because I can look at them just fine on the computer, but FFS, I like to have real pictures).
Anyway – he’s that guy who will see a big expense and freak.out. and stop spending money on anything. It works for him, I guess. He saved up a hell of a lot of money for a house, then a car, then my ring, then our honeymoon (I covered the wedding).
So I’m saying don’t sweat it. If he’s good with money normally it’s probably him being worried about… something. Maybe you could offer to take him out for ice cream to the mall and casually drop by a jewelry store. Point out a couple rings you sorta like and mention how you like them but you think $$ is a more reasonable budget, or you’ve done a little bit of research and getting a custom one is cheaper. Something to let him know that maybe it won’t cost what he thinks it might. Sometimes guys think we have crazy expectations. My husband had set his budget crazy high. I mean, I love my ring, but if he had told me I’d have been happy to assure him I’d love a ring less than half that price.