Weddingbee boards

I was inspired by Miss Cheeseburger's P.S. at the end of her bridesmaid dress post, about breaking bridal law at Alfred Angelo's. I recently had the same kind of experience when I went to meet with our florist. My mom, aunt and I went to talk about my ideas with him. About 85% of the things that I said made all 3 of their jaws drop, including - we are going to department stores to find dresses that look good together, but are not the same dress (but it won't look right! the photos! the flowers! oh my!)  I don't want FI's boutonniere to have a flower on it, I want it to be berries, acorns, and the like, (I got fun comments on this one- "but berries are for Easter!," "the groom needs a flower, but the groomsmen can have berries," and just blank stares that his bounterrie won't be the same flower as my bouquet) and we did not care very much about our cake. ("get a small cake that fits the 'ace of cakes style that everyone likes' and then have a sheet cake in the back.") NO. When I said we didn't care about the cake, that means we have no interest in an ace of cakes cake. Just a plain. normal. cake. Really. We want that.

It seemed that they were all reading from the same Wedding Bible and did not realize that it was possible to change things up a bit. I found the whole experience funny because I know they all want to make me happy and are trying to figure out how to get themselves out of the 'traditional' way weddings should be done, but their exasperated looks of shock and dispair when I said things like "I like the twig and berry look" were hysterical.

What makes it even funnier is that I am not straying that far from the Wedding Bible, at least we have a wedding party, a cake, a bounterrie, etc. I can only imagine the reaction of horror if I threw out one element all together.

Has anyone else had funny reactions to their not-perfectly-traditional wedding choices?

Thankfully noone made comments about our wedding choices.  Like you we didn't stray all that far from tradition, but we also didn't buy into the idea of perfection for the day.  I remember reading a blog somewhere where the bride to be was complaining that people seemed to see her wedding as a photo shoot, and she was more concerned with having a great day.

@redherring- HAAHAH. I rolled off my seat when I read that. Completely the reaction I got.

@stephin- By the time I told them I didn't want to do the boquet toss, they were already numbed by all my previous comments that they almost expected it. And that deer int he headlights look is the perfect way of explaining it!

KMSkull- maybe it was hay is for Easter? They threw so many traditional "this is for that" at me that I don't even remember! Does hay make sense?

mouse- exactly what I'm thinking! I want to tell the florist to spend a few hours on weddingbee, then we will be ont he same page!

I've had a few experiences like this. My mom tends to voice her concerns tactfully, like suggestions, while my FMIL is, um, more brash. I said I wanted simple floral centerpieces - nothing too ornate because no one ever remembers the flowers, and they're not important to me. "You HAVE to have big, gorgeous centerpieces," FMIL said. "People's jaws need to drop when they walk into the hall!" Last time I checked, my wedding wasn't about keeping up with the Joneses!

The other day my mom was asking me what kind of music we were planning on using at the ceremony:

"Well, we'll have live music while people are being seated, but I'd like to walk down the aisle to a recorded song."

"Um. (pause) Can you do that?"

"Yes, a lot of people do."

"Well what would you leave the church to?"

"Maybe bagpipes, but maybe more recorded music."

"And what would you sign the marriage licence to?"

"Um, recorded music?"

She was a bit surprised! Then she asked me how we'll handle a cake cutting if we're doing cupcakes, to which I replied, "Why do we have to cut a cake? Can't we just feed each other cupcakes?" The concept had never crossed her mind.

@jillianbean I went to a standing-only ceremony (it was because we all had to come inside last minute because of rain) and would NOT recommend it...standing in heels, straining to see, and trying not to move/sway for 15 - 20 minutes was uncomfortable (and I know this makes me sound like a priss!)  Part of it is that you have to get somewhere and stand for 20 minutes or so BEFORE the ceremony, so you wind up standing for a lot longer.

As far as bridal traditions go, my FSIL is also recently engaged, and I asked her what kind of reception she was thinking about having, and she responded, "There's only one kind in Louisiana"  I don't think I can convince her of anything else...

We're also not doing a garter toss, bouquet toss, flower girls or ring bearers.  We're also considering champagne before the ceremony because we had friends do it and we LOVED that detail!

That's funny! I think my goal for our wedding is break EVERY tradition! Why not?! It's your big day - do what you want!

@ surkim - fried oreos are the greatest things on earth. i would love to go to a wedding with them!

@surkim: Can I come to your wedding, haha? I am all for a wedding that reflects the bride and groom, so what if it's not the norm? It's going to be one of the most memorable days of your life!