- 3 years ago
- Wedding: May 1995
majorairhead: sorry – don’t know what that bit at the bottom is. Anyway the reason I moved it to emotional is I am not so much looking for medical info… I can find that online. There r so many other aspects to this. The biggest question I am wrestling with now is should I tell my children or wait until I have biopsy results? Would it be best to ease them into the idea I could have cancet or just drop the news if that is result? My oldest is 15 and does not like to be kept “in the dark”. Then again I do not want to cause needless worry or disrupt his concentration in school…. anyone with expetience in telling children this sort of news?
I’m sorry to hear about this, I hope everything works out for you in the future.
Ihad a biopsy last month after finding a lump near my armpit. I was given an ultrasound on my breast and told that nothing too apparent appeared, but called back for a biopsy at a later date and THEN called back for a mammogram. Apparently its just a harmless lump but when you’re waiting for results it’s easy to assume the worst. If you feel comfortable you should definitely confide in someone other than your husband if he’s not the best at being comforting.
I just noticed your second comment.
Its difficult when telling children about cancer. The closest experience I have is when my mam was diagnosed with cancer in her womb (she’s fine now). She told me about her appointments so I could go with her, and told my 18 year old brother just to warn him in case she got nasty results. She didn’t tell my 15/16 year old sister because she didn’t wan to distract her too and because my sister lost her dad to cancer when she was 8.
I suppose it depends on how mature your children are. I would say that when in doubt, wait until you have something definite to tell them. It might be worse having them worry for longer than necessary, especially if everything might turn out ok in the end. Good luck 🙂
CarlyPalmer: Thank you . Yeah after thinking it over I have decided to wait until after the biopsy. My doctor actually called to see how I am doing after he reading the radiology report (I was quite surprised he called himsrlf) and said it was not a terribly alarming reporort but definitely worth a follow up. That made me feel a little better. I will post back with results.
majorairhead: Its definitely best to wait until the biopsy results and if it is cancer, after you get a concrete treatment plan. This is what my mother did for me, I was 16 at the time. And had a bunch of questions that you just can’t answer without knowing all the details.
majorairhead: I have breast cancer so I might be able to give you my take on it. The good news is that most breast lumps in woman are just harmless cyst. But you should always get anything checked like you have done. It still amazes me how many women don’t check their breast or ignore things that feel odd.
Do not tell your children until after you have had the biopsy and get your results. People really underestimate how hard others take your diagnosis. I know in this time your support people should be the ones giving you support but often the patient is the one that ends up carrying the burden of making sure everyone is ok, putting on a brave face for appearance sake and worrying. Do not add to your stress.
I know that makes other people sound horrible for putting added pressure on a person who is ill, but it is just human nature. We worry and stress about those we love. Try and spare them that until it is necessary.
Kids are a lot more aware of the things adults try and hide from them. So once you tell them they will be more on edge especially if you talk in whispers etc. My nieces and nephews worry a lot about me. I can see that affects them. When they overhear me talk about results or going for check ups it can lead to them asking questions like am I sick again or am I going to die. I wish they didn’t have to go through that and could be just happy kids (which they are most of the time).
We didn’t tell my nieces and nephews until after we had a cancer diagnosis and when we did they initially took it better than expected. They asked a lot of questions so be prepared for that. There are some really great online resources for how to tell kids about cancer. You will probably find they are more cuddly. The two most common reactions from kids are becoming clingy or withdrawing. Both are perfectly normal reactions and you just need to respond to them with reassurance and love.
I wish you all the luck in the world for good results. But even if they are not good you know you can get through this. We suprise ourselves with how strong we are when faced with challenges liek this.
I’m so sorry. I will definitely say a prayer for you. Or, cross my fingers and toes if that’s your preference.
I had a benign biopsy so it does happen.
needing a breast bx is always scary. Being a RN, and dealing with this personally as well as my best friend also, this is a very common occurrence . You don’t have any really negative news yet. Cysts are almost always benign, so keep a positive attitude until you get the test results. The doctors are doing the right thing by investigating it completely. If it turns out to be something you need to treat, you have great family, your husband and MIL on your side. Treatment these days is so much better than years ago. A good friend of mine went thru chemo and radiation and taught 8th grade without missing a day. She had surgery over spring break and was back to work. Keep the faith, don’t let this get you drown, and enjoy everyday. Been there.
Hello bees – thank you so much for all your kind words and support! Just wanted to update and let you know I had the biopsy and – good news- benign cysts!! YAY!!!
Good news. I have had suspicious lumps before and was about to second the others… it’s always best to wait until after the biopsy before you tell people, I think.