Post # 1
Hello ladies! I recently got engaged and have started thinking about bridesmaids. I know I am not going to completely decide for awhile as I am still a junior in college and we are waiting until the May I graduate to wed. But I truly do not know how I should choose! I have a lot of good friends instead of one small group that has always been my friends. I have 3 friends from highschool that I know will be bridesmaids and 1 cousin. I am also in a sorority and live with one of my sisters. I love her and we are good friends but I am not sure about her being a bridesmaid. She likes to controleverything but if I dont ask her she will be heartbroken! Then I have my big and little in the sorority and if I ask one I must ask the other. I would like to ask them but I feel like I cant ask them and not my roommate sorority sister. Plus Idefinetely want my best friend not in the sorority. That makes 7! My FH has 4 little nieces we want to be junior bridesmaids but that is a huge bridal party! I am thinking about just not asking anyone in my sorority so no one will get their feelings hurt. I just dont know what to do.
Post # 2
Collegelove: I suggest you wait about a year, then think about it. There have been many posts from Bees who asked their attendants way too early and frienships and relationships changed.
Most likely you are going to have to narrow down your numbers. 11 or 12 attendants is for cathedral weddings.
Post # 3
Collegelove: I think asking no one in the sorority is safer. When it comes to bridal parties, I’m a big believer in “smaller is better”. You want your absolute best friends who you can’t imagine not being there – not everyone who is your friend. I only had 2 (bff and sister). You can still involve a wider circle in other things like the bachelorette party, attending the wedding, and even some special photos with them.
Also 4 nieces is a lot, and with young girls I think it really needs to be “all or none”, so I would suggest no junior bridesmaids.
Post # 4
aussiemum1248: thanks! Yeah I would rather cut out all the sorority sisters than his nieces. Mainly because the nieces are all sisters and they will be my only nieces or nephew I will have on either side if the family. If they were younger I would have them be flower girls. Only the youngest one will be little enough I think to be a flower girl though
Post # 5
Wait 8 months or so to figure it out. I had 7 bridesmaids for a 100-guest wedding and it worked perfectly. I suggest waiting and then including everybody who you want in your bridal party.
Post # 6
Waiting is the BEST idea ever. Don’t ask anyone, don’t feel obligated to hint that someone will be asked when the time comes. Your Sorors will totally be excited with and for you the entire time, but picking out ONE from the whole group is super hard and might hurt a lot of feelings.
Also, as for your Big and Little, unless you are SUPER VERY CLOSE to either of them (I was close with one of my littles for years, and never very close with my big), I would just consider them as honored guests.
GOOD LUCK AND CONGRATULATIONS!!!
Post # 7
Agree with PP’s – wait until you’re ready to start planning more. Friendships can definitely change, so you want to ensure that you ask those that you KNOW you want in your wedding at that time, and not now.
We are having a small wedding with about 40 people, and we opted to only have 2 people on each side in our wedding parties. Small and simple.
Post # 8
Collegelove: Agree with PP, I would wait until clsoer to ask friends. That’s what I did. I was worried about relationships changing. Weddings do bring out the worst in people sometimes. Good luck and Congrats!