Bridal Party Drama?

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
145 posts
Blushing bee

A wedding I was in last year changed over bridesmaids like four or five times.. lost track of it actually.  However, the bride was not the one who asked the girls to step down but the other way around due to the fact that the bride was making a lot of demands involving money for the bridal party and the stronger girls out of the crowd (unfortunately not me) where able to tell the bride that she wasn’t able to be in it any longer. 

The girls did not regret it and neither did the bride but the bride was a little upset at first that the girls backed out but got over it really quickly… it was the best for everyone involved.

If there is someone in a bridal party that isn’t working out.. I’d talk with them because otherwise after the wedding, a friendship or relationship may become strained.  I speak from experience.

Post # 3
7 posts

OMG this is the worst part of it all for me. I initially started out with 3 bridesmaids, a Maid of Honor and a Matron of Honor (which included my two sisters). I am now down to 2 bridesmaids, a Maid of Honor and a Matron of Honor (no sisters in the wedding). This had to be the most stressful part of the process for me. From the complaining about every hair style, every dress type, every shoe style to not having the money when deadlines were up and the excuses and the whining and ARGHHH, I’m over it. I told my FH, had I known it would be this much drama, I would have done this without a bridal party!

Don’t get me wrong, I have two that have stuck with me from day 1 but the others, hmph. With 15 days left before my “I Do’s” I can not and will not allow myself to be bothered by it any longer.


The end…thanks for letting me vent! 

Post # 4
555 posts
Busy bee

rbhs117:  I originally had 2 BM and 1 MOH, one of the BM was my FBILs girlfriend.. Well they broke up after 3 years of being together and while she was returning all his stuff to him she returned the gift I have her that asked her to be my bridesmaid. 

Five months later they got back together after my FI dropped one of his groomsmen to accommodate my side, now it’s awkward because she used to be a BM and isn’t now but is always around all the wedding festivities!

Post # 5
227 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I only have two people- my sister and best friend. However I know a bride who has had three subtractions and new additions to her bridal party and I think it’s ridiculous. I am just a believer that you ask only those closest to you, not the girl you met last year at happy hour because someone dropped out.

Post # 6
716 posts
Busy bee

I agree with asking only a small number from among those closest to you.  If you keep it small and keep it to people with whom you have an actual, long, deep relationship, then there’s less likely to be drams. 

I also think that you shouldn’t ask more than 6 months in advance.  It’s the asking way in advance that leads to problems when relationships and circumstances change and all that extra time just allows unnecessary drama to build.

Finally, I think brides also have to have realistic expectations.  Your bridesmaids aren’t going to help you plan your wedding, they’re not going to give you a large share of their time outside of your actual wedding day, and they’re not going to spend unlimited amounts for you or on you.  Beyond picking up a dress, potentially organizing people for a simple, not terribly expensive bridal shower and/or bachelorette, and showing up on your actual wedding day, I don’t think you can expect much more.  Having realistic expectations will also help to keep drama in check.

Because, of course, asking and then switching up the bridal party is going to hurt friendships.

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