Post # 1
Any else getting helpful “suggestions” for your wedding party? I’m getting married in July and they are still offering suggestions. I have no sisters and my sister-in-law is significantly older and not willing to buy into my saree idea, so I went with friends for bridesmaids. Heaven forbid I choose someone I’m close to. Apparently, I should have asked underage cousins that I have only seen a handful of times.
Post # 3
Thanks crazy! But I definitely know how you feel. I knew choosing a wedding party would cause a lot of drama, especially because I’m close with one of my sisters but not the other, and I knew I didn’t want her to be in my wedding party. In the end, Fiance and I decided to just have an Maid/Matron of Honor and Bridesmaid or Best Man, and I asked my one sister to be Maid/Matron of Honor. I thought this would limit the drama because we just have the two of them, and we’re each excluding other siblings (so it’s nothing personal against my other sister). But my mom still doesn’t seem to understand that my one sister isn’t a bridesmaid. She even asked me to send her the pic of my MOH’s dress, and then she told me she was going to tell my other sister about it so she could know what she has to wear. It was so hard to respond calmly. I just kept repeating that my sister shouldn’t wear anything like the Maid/Matron of Honor dress because I want my Maid/Matron of Honor to look and feel special on my wedding day.
Post # 4
Pffftttt… that sounds like something my mom would say. >:P
Just smile and nod… they mean well.
Post # 5
Ugh, yes. My mother keeps saying I should have my SIL in the wedding because *I* was in their wedding!
Um, nope, only family in the wedding is the kids. No siblings from EITHER side. Plus, my Fiance said if I even THOUGHT about it, the wedding would be off, lol. Soooo, guess who isn’t gonna be in the wedding? 😉
Post # 6
I know the feeling. My mom is basically insisting I ask all my female cousins even though I’m only close to one of them. She says I can’t ask one without inviting the others, even though I only see them once every few years. I agreed to that because it seemed rude not to, then she started questioning why I’m asking two of my college friends! If it were up to her my bridal party would be family only. Like you said, “Heaven forbid I choose someone I’m close to.”
Post # 7
My mom wants to me to include my sister but we arent close.. people think you can add new people the bridal party as often as you like
Post # 8
Luckily my Mother and Father understand that this is Fiance and my wedding party and we choose who we want.
But, Future Mother-In-Law does not understand that. The church we are getting married in you need a best man and a sort of co-best man. Fiance choose his best man and we choose my brother to be our co best man. We are both very close with my brother, we both consider him one of our best friends. Well Future Mother-In-Law wants her 60 something year old brother to be the co best man because “He is that religion and he is going to be at the wedding anyways.” Nothing against the guy, I really like him he was one of the first people in FI’s family to accept me, but I would not him in my wedding party. She also keeps on asking if Future Sister-In-Law is going to be in our Wedding Party, I am sorry but she made that decision when my parents (who are friends with her and sent her a pricey engagement present) were not invited to her 325 person wedding.
Post # 9
I’m so sorry it’s such a difficult decision for you. Besides the decision on 1 of my more recent friends being a Bridesmaid or Best Man or not, choosing all the rest of my ladies was pretty much set since I was a teenager (even though I’m 27, we’ve just all been close so long!)
Post # 10
I am so sorry about this! I had a good and a bad situation in this. Not really bad,just not what I imagined. I have always been closer with some guys friends and only have a couple really close girlfriends. And my Fiance has a lot of girl friends with a few close guy friends. I had always thought I would have a small wedding party. My Fiance has 3 SISTERS! HAHA so, I chose my sister for my Maid/Matron of Honor, and my two best friends. Then, I thought it would be nice to add his three sisters. Luckily, Fiance has 3 male cousins that he had been close with growing up. With him having all sisters, he chose his sister Boyfriend or Best Friend to be the best man. We are doing an uneven number (5 for him, 6 for me) But it worked out and we are happy with it.
I think its YOUR wedding. YOU need to chose what you want for it. This day should be about the love you and your Fiance have for each other. My mom doesn’t like a couple things I am doing, just small things. She thinks my wedding song is too fast (Michael Buble’s everything) and doesn’t like that we are doing a sweetheart table. However, she knows that this is what WE want, and thats what matters. PLease keep that in mind!! YOU and YOUR FIANCE need to be happy
Post # 11
I had something similar to this too. My Fiance and I chose the people that we wanted and already ended up with a larger party than I wanted to compromise for eachother. (we each have seven). everyone seemed happy, until the other day my grandmother called my mom explaining how my cousin (who I am not close with) is hurt that she is not asked to be in the wedding. I am going to see her in two weeks and know this has to be addressed. I was feeling bad and almost made her a junior bm, but my Fiance talked with me and reminded me that this is our day and asked if I truely want her as a junior bm. which my reply wwas no and he said then that’s it she is not in. “It is our day and we can’t listen to everyone, we have to do what we want and everyone will have to understand”..I was so thankful for the pep talk from him