Post # 1
So I recently had some pretty traumatic things happen to me while shopping for bridal gowns and I wanted your opinions!
So my FI and I are trying to plan a wedding pretty quickly. He is joining the Navy’s special operations unit to become an air rescue swimmer and that means we need to be married before he gets his orders.
We live in the DC area and my mom and grandma live in Connecticut. Sadly, this means that I have had to try going wedding gown shopping on my own. Not gonna lie- this was pretty hard and I really missed them while I was alone.
But the very first time I went to a boutique I went with my MOH. The first thing that the woman said to me was that my butt was probably too big to fit into her dresses! Can you believe that! I’m not saying that I’m the thinnest girl in the world (i’m about 5’10” and where a size 8) but even if i had the world’s largest butt you shouldn’t tell a bride to be that!
So, I got over it kinda and then decided to pop into a consignment bridal shop when I was running errands. I figured because it was a consignment shop that I wouldn’t need an appointment. I was wrong. The owner said I needed an appointment but the floor woman decided to help me for 30 minutes before the bridal party came in at 1pm.
So anyways, she helped me try on a dress and then the phone rang. I was standing there alone really missing my mom and grandma. At that point while I’m on the podium alone the bridal party came in early and the owner walked past me into the back room. All the sudden I hear her yelling about the fact that the floor woman was helping me and that I was in a gown and the wedding party was waiting! She was screaming at the top of her lungs that I had a gown on and how mad she was. I heard everything- and I feel lke the bridal party might have as well. I was mortified and started tearing up. THe floor woman came back and I told her I was going to leave and explained to her what happened. She was really sweet to me but I just felt so embarrased.
So far, I haven’t gone to another bridal shop- not gonna lie I’m pretty afraid to. Any of you bees had a bad experience with pretentious wedding shops? I think the whole industry has gotten rediculous and needs an ego check!
Post # 3
What a horrible experience. I strongly encourage you to write a review on Yelp about your exeprience.
And they are protentious.
Before I was engaged, while on a stroll, I walked into a Bridal Boutique to just look around. The women that owns the boutique, came up to me and asked if I was engaged yet, loudly, everyone staring. I said “not yet” and she proceeded to smirk and walked away.
And a couple of months ago I walked into another Bridal Boutique to be able to try on 3 dresses out of the 100s they carry because I am a street size 10 and they do not carry a lot of anything bigger than a bridal size 8. Lol, I had a good laugh about that one but seriously.
This is why I have decided to have my dress made by a corset shop. It will be much cheaper than buying a dress 3 sizes too big and then paying for the alterations. Plus the dress will be made out of hemp! AND most importantly, I will modify the dress after the wedding so I Can wear it out.
Look into that, if you are in the Philadelphia area, the corset shop is called Delicious.
Post # 4
@LauraPezz: yelp.com is your best friend. And have an awesome, no-nonsence -defender best friend with you to take up the hard-ass-mom role.
Post # 5
I’d be upset too, and the owner clearly was rude, but I can see her side as well. She had an appointment that was already established, and you were a walk-in. Appointments always take precedence. There were better ways of handling it, of course.
The big butt lady, what the heck. She’s an idiot, and definitely at it to Yelp.
If you go anywhere else, I would recommend making appointments, knowing what you want style-wise, and bring your MOH again! This definitely wasn’t my experience in bridal shops, so hopefully the next one will be better.
Post # 6
The bridal shop here is super bitchy. I ordered my dress online, but I wanted to purchase my veil. I had earlier that day taken my dress to a seamstress (not affiliated with bridal shop) to change the neckline into a sweetheart. The seamstress specifically told me “wear loose clothes, you’ll be changing in and out of them.”
So after I dropped my dress off, I went to the bridal boutique wearing really casual clothing. I think I had on a pair of Lululemon’s, a university sweater, and UGG boots. I walked in the door, and the women instantly sneered at me. One because I wasn’t wearing makeup and look young, and 2 because I didn’t look rich.
I went in to look at veils, and she points me to the sale rack. I explain what I want, which I know will have to be custom. She goes “Oh…well that will be really expensive, are you sure that’s in your budget?” Bitch.
I happened to know the staff were on commission (thanks yelp), so that pissed me off a lot. The second I said that I wanted a custom designer veil, and had allocated about $800 bucks for it, she became creepily nice. I was so pissed. Unfortunately it was the only bridal shop that could cater to my request in the area, so I was stuck with them.
So later on, like..3 weeks, I went to pick up my custom veil. I was actually dressed presentably, and I had dyed my hair. Women didn’t recognize me, even though it was the same fucking staff. The second I walked in the door, I was greeted SO warmly.
Post # 7
I think you just found a rotten shop. I went looking by myself as well and most of the shops I went into were nice and friendly. I always had appointments and showed up promptly. Surprisingly no one even asked what my budget was.
Post # 8
@the_future_mrs: Seriously?! Sounds like Pretty Woman!!
And to the OP, I’d try not to let it get you down. Maybe if you book an appointment and go in with a clear idea of what you want, and your budget, you can just get it done quickly. I’d look for reviews online before you try another place, though.
I can’t believe how dumb some people are. I worked in sales before, and unless a customer was outright rude to me, I would be nice to everyone. And that owner was ridiculous. Don’t these people want business?!
Some people need to learn not to judge a book by its cover. Several years ago my boyfriend (he was still married to his ex wife) received a significant bonus from work. He walked into a pricey custom suit place and was prepared to drop thousands on a few new suits. He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt and NO ONE paid any attention to him. He walked out, they lost the sale… and he spent that money on a couple of large hand-made rugs instead.
Post # 9
I am so sad that you had a bad experience! We just moved to Northwest Arkansas and none of my family or friends live closer than 4 hours away, so I had to go by myself too. We have two very nice boutiques about 5 miles from our house and I was TERRIFIED to go in. First b/c I have gained a considerable amount of weight in the three years we’ve been together (from a 3/5 to a 10 in jeans), and I was convinced I wouldn’t fit into any of the dresses. Secondly, I was afraid they’d be mean, LOL. It turns out I had nothing to worry about! I did Yelp the dress shops like the previous posters mentioned, but I was still nervous. The first shop I just popped in b/c I wanted to ask if they had a certain Enzoani gown. They didn’t but offered to put me in a couple others right then and there. I made an appointment for a different shop and they were amazing as well. The second shop is where I “found my gown”. I fit into EVERY SINGLE DRESS (thank God for boning and corsets) and the ladies were so nice.
I would tell the first shop you went to that if they think your butt is too big they can kiss it, and find a place that is excited to work with new brides. This is supposed to be a happy day, not a stressful or sad one.
I wish you the best of luck and I know you will find the right store…and it will have the right dress for you 🙂
Post # 10
@xlsm: Thank you so much for sharing your experience and for everyone’s support. It’s really nice to know that others have done shopping by themselves and I wasn’t just the only one that had to go through it! I feel so much better after reading everyone’s posts!
Don’t worry about the weight gain. I wear a size 8-10 so you’re just like me! Besides clothing is all about finding what makes you look good (and unforunately all the women’s fashions of today seem to be against that!). I’m so glad you found your dream dress I’m sure you’re going to look gorgeous!
I talked to my mom about the whole thing and we think that I’m going to have my dress made (check out http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/new-bee-custom-dress for pictures of what I want). I’m gonna make a trip home to try on gowns with my mom and grandma at some point (hopefully) so at least I get that experience.
And if anyone ever doesn’t have anyone to go dress shopping with in the DC area, I’ll go with you cause I know how scary it can be!
Post # 11
@canarydiamond: That’s the exact phrase I used when describing what happened to my mom!!!!
Post # 12
@LauraPezz: Glad you found a solution and sorry to hear you had such crappy experiences.
The only thing i would say that if you have already settled on having a gown custom made, it really isn’t fair to go somewhere else and try on dresses for the “experience” when there’s no chance you’ll buy any of them. I know my consultant worked really hard for me, tying me up, listening to me, bringing me dresses and everything else. We were almost 2 hours there, and then another 40 minutes a week later when I went back to try on my favourite and order it. That’s a lot of time and effort for a sales consultant to spend on a customer that isn’t going to ever buy from them. Just something to consider.
ETA: and if you’ve paid a deposit for a gown to someone else, you REALLY shouldn’t try on gowns elsewhere because it’s a surefire guarentee you’ll find something you like better.
Post # 13
I am sorry you had such traumatic appointments! I’m plus sized so I was really dreading the experience, but luckily I saw on line good recommendations for the shop in MD that I eventually got my dress from. They treated me really nicely, and took the stress out of the experience for me. And I got a killer dress!
Don’t give up – even if you get your dress on-line, you need to try different styles to get an idea of what you like.
Post # 14
I had one bridal appointment and I actually drove 6 hours to where my mom and grandma lived so that they could be there. If you can, it might be worth checking out a flight– Southwest has them for $85 each way from BWI to Hartford and Amtrak has $50 train fares each way.
Also, I find that being upfront about what you want and making an appointment helps. I wouldn’t go alone, but I would bring a couple trusted friends. Good luck!
Post # 15
Sorry you had some rough experiences! I live around DC, with my mom in New England and MOH in California. I wasn’t looking forward to dress shopping alone, either.
I had a pretty good experience at Ellie’s Bridal in Alexandria, VA. It was the first place I went, because of their great Yelp reviews. Nice consultant, no pressure, pretty nice dresses. The shop itself isn’t very fancy.
Then I had a FANTASTIC experience at Curvy Girls Bridal in Fairfax. Brand new store and super nice inside. I’m also 5’10 and an 8/10 street size, and the smaller samples at Curvy Girls fit like a glove, they clipped me into larger ones. All of the other brides who were there while I was were tall. I’d definitely recommend going there.
Post # 16
@LauraPezz: Awww, I’m sorry it hasn’t been a wonderful experience for you so far 🙁 If i lived near you I would join your shopping entourage!