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Bridal Shower at 2... not excited.

posted 10 months ago in Parties
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    1.
    Member
    79 posts
    Worker bee
    FutureLeep9    September 10, 2011  

    Recap:

    Fiance's family has a rollercoaster relationship with Aunt throwing the party. 

    Fiance's sister (also a bridesmaid) was essentially forced to host the party.

    1. My FI's sisters (both bridesmaids) DO NOT help and have never offered to help with the wedding... had I known this I wouldn't have had them bridesmaids.

    2. It's soooo awkward for me to go to a party hosted by the nonhelping bridesmaid who was ticked she HAD to do it. But to everyone else it will look like she's done SOOO much, when she really hasn't.

    3. From the outside looking in, friends of mine see this shower as not really for me but for the family... as in, the Aunt proving herself, and the BM showing she actually is helping (oh the blindness of the family).

    4. I don't have anything to wear to it... our extra money (hate you student loans) goes towards to the wedding crafts... and so everyone will be all cute... I'll be in old clothes...

    5. It really really really bothers me that I don't want to go. Isn't this something I should be excited for?

    6. Other bridesmaids excluding the other FIs sister can't be there... out of state and family emergency... yay....

     
    2.
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    Helper bee
    yassim    January 1, 2011   CALIFORNIA

    I had bridal shower drama too because of my fiance's sister causing nothing but problems. I admit it was awkward, but it was only because I let it be-- or rather, I let myself focus on that. Everyone was focused on me, and the only awkwardness was people not talking as much (because everyone knew there was an "elephant in the room"!). I mean, I can't say it won't be awkward for you, but at the same time, it helped that I had a couple drinks right after I got there, got to talking to people, and honestly, before I knew it the party was over! But yeah it bugged me for a bit that it wasn't what I envisioned (the happiness part) but when I sought out similar situations I found many... a lot of drama unfolds with the wedding stuff and the parties are not always what you hope for! You're so not alone! But... I know, it doesn't make it easier.

    Also I think if you don't have anything new to wear maybe you could buy some new accessories to dress it up a bit? I almost didn't find anything, there's a lot of deals at places like Macys that have really nice dresses.

    Another thing too is don't forget the people that know NOTHING of the drama! They're kind of a saving grace, they break up the awkwardness a bit

     
    3.
    Member
    79 posts
    Worker bee
    FutureLeep9    September 10, 2011  

    So glad to know I'm not alone.  The worst part is everyone on this side of the family knows about the drama... ACK!

    And I'm off to buy something new to wear because my fiance thinks that if I have a cute new outfit, I'll be more excited. :)

    Gash, we shall see!

     
    4.
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    1,997 posts
    Buzzing bee
    bloodgo1    May 14, 2010   Royal Oak

    Bridal shower drama sucks for sure. Not all of my bridesmaids knew each other super well and some of them ended up being jerks about helping to pay for it (there were 7 total so I had thought it would be better because then they would have to pay less since there were more people to contribute). It hurt my feelings a lot, but I just tried not to focus on that part. Once I was able to just ignore that it ended up being an amazing day.

    Now I'm on the other side of the table planning a bridal shower for someone else. There's only 3 of us and one of them refused to tell me how much she'd be contributing until a couple of weeks ago (making it a month and a half before the shower) so that was really annoying. Luckily I've been through the whole wedding thing before and don't really know this girl very well so wasn't going to let her off the hook/take crap so I straightened it out with her very quickly. Don't know why people get so dang weird when they are a bridesmaid. Its like don't sign up for the job if you aren't willing to put in the work. Then some people say "Well if they've never done it before then they might just now be learning what it entails" - definitely don't have patience for that... If you didn't know what it meant to be a bridesmaid before you said you'd do it, that's your own problem for not figuring it out.

     

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