Post # 1
Im having a hard time making a decision about my bridal shower being the day before the wedding… My FML says NO.. its unfair to my guest and its just not the way things are done… My friends say do what you want..Its your weekend!
Im having it the day before the wedding because thats when my close family and friends will be in town. If i have it earlier in the month , as my FML suggested, it would be unfair for me to ask my friends to travel to my state, then travel again for the wedding 3 weeks later…
What do you think?
Post # 3
@RaysBride89: Can you have 2 ? Maybe your MiL can.throw one for local friends…then.you can have a more intimate one with family and out of state friends the day before…your mother in law doesn’t need to go to that one
Post # 4
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
Hmm yeah, I don’t love the idea.. sounds like it would be super overwhelming for the guests and more importantly YOU! All those people, the gift organizing, the attention on you for hours on end, the food, then… on top of it, the rehearsal dinner? You’d make it into a very long weekend for them.
If people can’t come, they won’t come. Don’t feel bad about that!
Post # 5
It also may appear a little gift grabby to your OOT guests.
NOT saying that is your intention, but may be seen that way.
Post # 6
I agree with your FMIL. I don’t think you should expect OOT guests to attend your shower.
Also, don’t you think you’ll be a bit busy the day before the wedding?
Post # 7
I’m having a small bridesmaids brunch/shower 2 days before the wedding so that my bridesmaids didnt have to travel for the big shower and then again for the wedding. Its also a time that I can give them their gifts and feed them a nice meal while they are in town. So I guess its more for them than for me…
Post # 8
I think it’s a bad idea. I agree with PP that it looks a little gift grabby. I would have it eariler in the month. You can invite the out of state friends but expect that they will decline and will only have local guests attend.
Post # 9
@PuntaCanaBride: Okay.. why “gift grabby”?
Post # 10
Because you are obligating your OOT guests to now bring two gifts with them, so they can give you gifts two days in a row. And this is after spending money for travel expenses. To me, that is too much to ask of your guests.
Post # 11
@imabridesmaid: im not asking for 2 gifts but if i was to have the shower a month prior it still would be them buying 2 gifts so i just dont understand what the big deal is. it so annoying that everything you do has an underlying message. what ever happened to just doing things for fun?
Post # 12
The underlying message is…the point of having a shower is the gifts, to SHOWER the bride. If you have a shower, that is what they are going to expect. I didn’t write the rules, lol!
If you want to just do something “for fun”, have a BBQ/picnic or more informal get-together!
To clarify: I do agree with your point that they will likely give two gifts anyway. What I meant earlier was that I thought it may be too much for them AT ONCE.
Post # 13
Register somewhere online like amazon so if your guests cannot travel to you they can still purchase a gift online if they would like.
I have neve been a fan of this but I have had a few friends do it… They have a pampered chef or sometype of home party for their shower and out of town guests can make purchases for themselves/and you while helping you recieve a bunch of free product as well.