Weddingbee boards

Ok bees so a little background! My Fiancé and I have been engaged nearly two years now. Originally I asked my long time friend to be my MOH. Long story short 3 months, a ton of drama, a ton of stress, a bridesmaidzilla and a wrecked friendship later I had to have a heart to heart with her. Things are much better between us but she is now just a guest.

I ended up asking my FSIL to be my MOH. Now I knew going into it that she lived across the Country, was in and out of jobs and that she is kind of unreliable. However.....here we are 42 days before the wedding and now I am concerned!

I am a very laid back, easy going bride. I am in no way a bridezilla.....I am a little to passive I think. She had planned on coming out here in September......and when that didn't happen.....October.....and when that didn't happen.......novemebr.....and when that didn't happen.......December.....and when that didn't happen the beginning of January.....and when that didn't happen the end of January! She finally got here and just my luck I was down with the flu the two days she was here.

She had been "planning" on throwing a bridal shower for me but her Grandpas wife offered as well. They decided to host one together since my FSIL is tight on money right now. The GRandpas wife and I decided on a date and she was supposed to send out invites. 2 weeks later and 20 calls and voicemails to her later......I get a phone call from my FFIL who apologizes and says that the Grandpas wife feels it is too late to throw the shower now and will not be doing it. No surprise I guess...I kind of expected that from her.....that's what she does.

However.....now my FSIL is in beauty school and I find I am throwing my own shower. My mom and a few friends have offered to help but my FSIL aka MOH is not helping at all and today said she may not even be there. She is not throwing a bachelorette party, a bridal shower and has not helped with anything......in fact we bought her dress because she couldn't and it was almost too late to order.

I am frustrated. I love these people and get that they have lives and that it is tough......but I feel that this is just getting kind of rude?! Am I wrong to feel this way? We are paying for the whole wedding ourselves and I am planning it up till the day of all by myself....I can't handle a shower on top of it....and I was hoping to at least have a girls night out before the weddi....is that now my job too?!?!

What would you do?