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Bridal shower stress... need advice

posted 1 year ago in Parties
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    Helper bee
    AmberEyes    October 9, 2010   Toronto

    Hi ladies,

    So, a lot of people have backed out of attending my shower (most of them are from my fiance's family) and I am sad and feel rejected. I am worried that my shower will look barren and lame. Anyone go through the same situation? What did you do? How did your shower go? Any advice for me? I am just feeling so low right now.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    Rgeddy    June 13, 2010   Raleigh, NC

    I had a situation where nobody would plan a shower for me.  Everyone was out of town and my BM's took too long to plan it so people made travel plans that didn't involve coming to a shower.  It really hurt until something got thrown together last minute and it was great!  Even if there's a limited # of people you'll still have fun!

     
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    Helper bee
    AmberEyes    October 9, 2010   Toronto

    @Rgeddy: Thanks! I'm glad you still had fun even though it was thrown last minute. How many people attended? I just feel sad, but hopefully I do have fun, it's tomorrow.

     
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    Bumble bee
    nmsoonerbride    March 19, 2011   Live in New Mexico, wedding in Oklahoma City

    I think small showers are the best!   More intimate, and it's likely that the  people who ARE there are the people YOU know well and feel comfortable with.  IMHO, that makes it easier to relax and just have fun, instead of worrying about impressing FI's family.  Enjoy it for what it is....as chance to celebrate with the people closest to you.  I bet you have a great time.  (oh, and mine will be a small shower because we live so far away from most family members and really I'm pretty relieved.)

     
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    Honey bee
    jennifer_espos    June 18, 2010   NYC

    I had a similar situation.  I had a shower in my husbands home town to include his family and a lot of them didn't come for whatever reason.  I was really bummed about it too.  It ended up being a nice shower, I do still wish there were more people there.  But overall things were just fine.

     
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    Helper bee
    FutureMrsZapper    October 30, 2010   NC/ FL

    @AmberEyes: I just had the same thing happen to me! 1 friend bailed and still hasn't told me why, 1 friend's grandmother ended up in the hospital so she couldn't make it, 2 family memebers didn't come, another family friend had to work, etc. I had maybe 11 people there. I was really bummed to not have a bigger turn-out and started taking it a little personally, but I had to take a few deep breathes and just enjoy/savor the moments!

    My bridal party was all there and hosted the most amazing day for me though! I was happy to not have to think about anything and still felt so much love from those that were there! They put so much time and effort into the little details so it all worked out and my mood quickly changed! My FI was dissapoint in the lack of registry gifts we received, but I guess that's never a guarentee.

    Don't worry about it. You will really have a good time no matter who is there. Just focus on the positive. Less stress is best ;) Too many other things to worry about, don't add this to the list. Trust me, it's not worth it. Wishing you a very HAPPY shower! :)

     
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    Bumble bee
    jaylovessteez    September 19, 2010   CA

    My bridesmaids and mom planned my bridal shower for next weekend. Since my FI has a big mouth and FMIL has a bigger mouth... LOL they didn't tell them because they wanted it to be a suprise. After thinking they had the wrong list to my wedding.. because i kept saying " I dont want anyone who isn't invited to the wedding, invited to the bridal shower" they finally told me.. But its the same day FMIL was going to Texas to look for a place. So she is unable to go...

    So since his family is so "Conservative" i think his mom was just worried because my family loves to drink talk crap and have a good time. his mom was worried about FI's Grandma and aunts so she is throwing me something different at her house later. at first i was mad because what the heck are they going to do at the wedding? like my family is going to be there i felt insulted. but i'm over it whatever my family is my family and that is all that matters. we arent going to change or front for anyone else. :)

     
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    Helper bee
    AmberEyes    October 9, 2010   Toronto

    @nmsoonerbride: Thank you! You're so right, the small showers will be easier to relax in. I'm just hoping mine won't be lame :(

    @jennifer_espos: Thanks for sharing! :)

     
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    Helper bee
    AmberEyes    October 9, 2010   Toronto

    @FutureMrsZapper: Thank you sooo much for telling me about your experience. I feel better somewhat. Like you, I will have my family and my bridesmaids there, so I should be happy and just concentrate on those people who decided to be there and support me. It's so hard not to take it personal, especially since my fiance's family has a long history of being mean and spiteful towards me. But as you said, I don't need to add this to my list of stressors. Thank you again!! :)

     
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    Helper bee
    FutureMrsZapper    October 30, 2010   NC/ FL

    @AmberEyes: No problem! Glad to ease your mind!

    Let me know how the shower turns out! Sure it will be a fabulously girly time! :)

     

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