Bridal Shower With No Registry

posted 3 years ago in Parties
  • poll: Registry necessary for Bridal Shower?
    You can't have shower without a registry! : (20 votes)
    63 %
    Enjoy the shower, no registry necessary. : (8 votes)
    25 %
    Other idea or comment... : (4 votes)
    13 %
  • Post # 4
    5460 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Firstly, you don’t have to have a bridal shower per se, would she be willing to host a ladies lunch instead?

    If it’s a shower that she’s insisting, is there any way you could register for certain upgrades or to stock up on linen items?  We didn’t have tons of space and had been living together for about 2 years when we got married, so we registered for nicer plates, cookware, sheets, towels, and a small handful of decorative items.  We later had a yard sale and made a trip to Goodwill with our old toaster, coffee maker, pots/pans/dishes.

    Post # 5
    8503 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I guess…why are you having a shower then?  Physical gifts are the point of it. 

    Maybe you could have some other type of shower?  Like a stock the bar shower (have people bring bottles of liquor or wine).  Lingerie shower?  Maybe one where everyone brings a favorite recipe? 

    Maybe you could just do a bridal celebration (not shower!) and ask for no physical gifts but if someone asks then let them know you prefer a gift card (to Target, Home Depot, etc).

    Honestly…I would be VERY confused if I was invited to a shower and they didn’t list the registry on the invite.  I wouldn’t really know what to do.

    Otherwise, are there any items you need upgrades to?  If so you can create a small registry for that.

    Post # 6
    42157 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    If you don’t want physical gifts, I would ask your MIl to hold a luncheon or tea instead of a shower, or have a themed shower as a pp suggested.

    I am really uncomfortable with the idea of registering with the full intent of returning gifts for a store credit. I find it really disrespectful of the time and energy I put into purchasing your gift.

    It’s different if you get duplicates. Obviously, you need to do returns in that case.

    Post # 7
    307 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I’m throwing a shower for my sister and she hasn’t/won’t register because she says they don’t need anything. I’ve decided to throw her a plants and booze shower.  They don’t have a lot of plants and who doesn’t like booze?   I think she just more wants a get together as she is having a DW and only a handfull of people are going. 

    Post # 8
    10904 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    You do not need to have a registry to have a bridal shower, although I agree with a prior poster that you may be better off being the beneficiary of a tea or luncheon instead of a shower, since you do not desire gifts.

    Guests invited to a bridal shower will attempt to find out where a couple is registered — either by asking the shower hostess or one of the couple’s friends or family members, by asking the bride or groom directly, or through an online search.

    If you are — or if the shower hostess or someone else close to you is —  directly asked about this, it’s perfectly fine for you, the shower hostess, or your close friend or family member to respond, “We (Beachbride and soon-to-be Mr. Beachbride) didn’t register for gifts, because we (they) really have everything we (they) need.  We’re just getting together for an afternoon of food, fun, and friendship (to honor her) before the wedding.”

    At that point, guests likely will choose their own gift for you based upon the closeness of their relationship to you.  For example, some of your closer girlfriends may choose to give you beautiful lingerie.  An aunt may give you a box of handwritten recipes or a particular kitchen tool that she loves using herself.  A co-worker may give you a gift card to a favorite restaurant so that you and Mr. Beachbride could enjoy a great lunch or dinner. Someone who knows your FMIL may give you a beautiful bowl.

    I would discourage you from purposefully establishing a registry at a store that will allow you to return any and all gifts for cash with the expressed plan of returning all of the gifts for cash. Such stores do exist (BBB being among them), but I personally do not think this is a very nice thing to do on any level.

    Post # 10
    563 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @beachbride1216:  I agree with a PP that you should have a stock-the-whatever you need party! Someone was just telling me about a couple who had a stock-the-pantry party and people bought all sorts of non-perishable food & pantry items to stock their home. It sounded awesome!

    Post # 11
    1928 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Here are some ideas. Your MIL could send out an invite that has a ‘theme’ on it

    – Stock the Bar Shower – everyone brings a bottle of liquor or bar supplies

    – Lingerie Shower – put your lingerie size on the invite

    – A Spa/Makeover Shower – everyone brings their favorite spa/beauty product and a beauty tip for the bride

    – Cooking Class Shower – I had a cooking class shower at a local culinary school we learned how to make a fun brunch and then we made it and ate. No opening gifts, no games.  I printed recipe cards and put them in the envelope and asked everyone to bring their favorite recipe. 

    – A ‘Date Night’ Shower – everyone brings a gift / gift certificate so you and your FI can go out together

    – A Wine Shower – Everyone brings a bottle of wine for you and DH to open up at a special occasion – 1st anniversary, 1st fight, 6 month anniversary, 1st dinner party, etc.  Buy a wine tasting kit to go with the theme and try different glasses of champagne, processeco, etc.


    Post # 12
    9526 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I agree with PPs. Your options are:

    1. Have a ladies tea/luncheon with no gifts
    2. Have a shower and register for upgrades or things you’ll need eventually (new sheets/towels, shower liners, etc.)
    3. Have a shower and dont register and just prepare yourself to recieve lots of cut crystal bowls and dishtowels

    I would pick option 1!!!

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