Post # 1
Just wondering if anyone has advice on who to invite to the bridal shower?
I think my future Mother In Law would like to have one for just her side of the family but that would be really awkward for me since I’m not too close to his the women in his family other than his mother, obviously (there’s not many, only a few aunts and his mother). Plus, I have a nagging feeling that if she was in charge of the guest list, the shower would end up being a giant list of obscure family friends, most of which I’ve never met.
So I’d like to just have one which is to be hosted by my mother and MOH, my sister. But I think my FMIL expects to have all her female relatives and friends invited to this shower… is that normal? Is it okay for me to just have her there instead of his aunts and her friends? I know it seems odd to have her be the only female on his side present, but he doesn’t have any sister or even close female cousins…
Post # 3
Could you have two showers? You could have one and invite her family and friends and do it for the more mature crowd and then have another young funkier shower for your friends etc.
Post # 4
I’m having multiple showers with very different guest lists.
In your case, you should let your FMIL host a shower since it means so much to her (and you’ll get presents). Its fine if its all her family/friends (as long as these people are actually invited to your wedding). Your MOH, Mom, and sister can host a shower for your friends and family.
The only rule with showers is the people invited to the shower need to be invited to your wedding.
Post # 5
Yes, well that’s where I’m having a bit of an issue, if she were to host a shower with just his side of the family, there would only be about 5 or 6 women from his side. Many of his relatives are traveling in from across the country for the wedding, but I would not ask them to do this just for the shower, so I think my FMIL would want to fill out the guest list and the only way she could do this is by inviting her family friends from our hometown (most of which aren’t invited to the wedding).
Plus, I would really just like to have one shower (I don’t do very well being the center of attention all the time and so I’d like to minimize the parties centered solely around me). Any suggestions on how to let her know that I’d only like to have one and tell her that she can’t invite her friends to the shower if they’re not invited to the wedding? Because I don’t think she knows or would care about that etiquette tip, I think she’d shrug it off and say “Oh, they won’t mind that they’re not invited to the wedding…” but it would obviously make me feel really awkward to say “oh, you’re invited to the shower, but not to the wedding..”.