Post # 1
Can anyone tell me more about the purpose of a table for the bride, groom, and their parties, but not their parties’ dates / husbands / wives? I have a wedding coming up and the bride wants to separate us from our SOs. I think it’s weird and demanding. She even said the other day that “bridesmaids and groomsmen aren’t just guests at the wedding.” So what are we? True “maids”? Bummer. I wanted to sit with my new husband and enjoy the evening, but it sounds like most of the time I’ll be with the bride and other bridesmaids. I mean, I love her and like the ladies she’s chosen, but I think it’s rude to separate people like that!
What are your thoughts on this? Rude? OK? How can they compromise if they’re having big bridal / grooms parties?
Post # 3
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
It’s pretty normal in my area, normally after dinner ends no one’s sitting at the head table. The B&G go to make their rounds and the BMs and GM will sit with their dates.
I’m having a small bridal party so we’re doing what I’ve heard referred to as a “King Arthur Table” and the party will get to sit with their dates. But it wouldn’t work for large parties and some people plain don’t like it.
Post # 4
Are you talking about just at the table for the reception? If that’s the case, it’s not rude, it’s how it is… I’ve never seen a wedding that went any other way… Bridesmaids sit on one side, Groomsmen on the other. I’ve been to a wedding where my fiance was a groomsman and I was just attending with him and I had to sit at another table while he was at the head table. I wasn’t upset or anything because that’s how it works.
Post # 5
Weird I’ve never seen that except in like photos… I like my friends but I don’t want to sit with them all night I’m not marrying them! 😛
Good luck hope you guys still enjoy yourselves 🙂
Post # 6
Really? At any wedding I’ve been to in the past 5 years, there’s been a separate table for just the bride and groom, or else the bridesmaids’ and groomsmens’ dates sat with them. But obviously this won’t work for like 8 BMs and 5 GM. I guess I’m bummed because I feel like I won’t get to see him at all that weekend – Friday through Sunday, until finally the seated part of dinner is over!
Post # 7
the classic bridal party long table is the most popular option..but it is def dying out. There are soo many other options now adays.king arthur, sweetheart, B& G eatting with their parents ( or kids ) etc…there is NO right or wrong way at a wedding
im doing a sweetheart table..
PP is right.. after dinner 90% of the time you will then get to dance and be with your SO, unless the bride needs help in the toiletries area
there isnt to much you can do when its the brides day an thats the way she wants it..speically if the seating charts are done…
Post # 8
@hisprettygirl: OP can you tell us where you’re from? I’m very curious what areas do not have a head table. In my area it is very common, so common in fact that I’ve been to like 30 weddings in my life, but this year was the first wedding I had been to that did not have a head table. In that wedding the wedding party was seated amongst the guests with their spouses/friends/family and the bride and groom sat at the parent’s table.
Post # 9
I’m a little dumb founded by your post. I think you’re looking at it the wrong way and I think you’re the one being rude.
There’s no reason that you can’t be seated at a separate table than your hubby for dinner (because that’s really all it’d be for).
It’s your friends wedding so it doesn’t matter either way. It’s one day. Suck it up! :]
Post # 10
@plzhalp: I’ve only been to 1 wedding in my life that had a head table – every wedding I’ve been to is either a sweetheart table or the bride/groom sitting with the family. I didn’t even really realize it was a thing until coming onto the bee.
I didn’t want to do that, but I won’t begrudge those that do. I guess it’s whatever you’re used to. If the bride wanted me to plop down at a head table, I’d do it for her.
Post # 11
It was like this for one of the weddings I was in. I hated it. I’m shy so being apart from my FI during social stuff sucks IMO. However, I dealt with it and just made smiley faces with my FI…probably woulda been less awkward for everyone else if they had just seated us together 🙂 🙂
This is why we are not doing it this way at our wedding. But if it was my friend’s wedding I’d live with it and escape as soon as I could :/
Post # 12
@misspeanut: Ok WB says you are from Texas. Is it a southern thing to not have a head table?
Post # 13
That’s how we’re doing it at our wedding and how it’s been at every wedding I’ve ever attended in the past. This is usually only the case through dinner and speeches though, then everyone just goes and sits wherever. You’ll be fine!!! Just smile pretty through the speeches for the pics and then go sit by your man.
Post # 14
Most weddings I’ve been to have the head table for the bride, groom, and bridal party. I wanted a head table, but my BMs asked me early on to not have one, so we’re going with a Sweetheart +1 table (us, and FH’s son) and the bridal party will all be seated at the front row of tables with their family/guests.
My FH says I try too hard to make everyone happy, and at some point I need to do what I want. So OP’s bride is just doing what she wants, which I see nothing wrong with b/c it’s her wedding.
Post # 15
I’ve always seen the bridesmaids& groomsmen sitting at the head table without their dates. I would consider it “normal”, but at the same time, also rather sucky.
One of the things I really want for our wedding is to have our wedding party’s SO’s sitting with us at the head table, my FI took some convincing, but it worked out numberswise.
Post # 16
i think its pretty common to have a head table (although sweetheart tables seem to be overtaking them now)… i know it kinda sucks to not sit with your DH, but its just one meal! i wouldnt let it stress you out!