Bride's and Groom's informal names on the invitation?

posted 3 years ago in Paper
Post # 4
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@jg780806: How formal is the wedding itself? 

Post # 5
Member
7206 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I always say that common sense trumps etiquette. If common sense tells you that “Jackie and Bill” will make more sense to your guests, then use it.

EDIT: Thinking a bit more, my feeling is that if you want a more “formal” feel, you should use surnames as well. The “problem” with “Jacqueline and William” is that it’s first names only.

Post # 7
Member
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@jg780806:  I would put your birth names on the invites.

Post # 8
Member
2878 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Hmm.  I think either would be fine.  If you really don’t identify as “Jacqueline and William” and it makes you uncomfortable, don’t do it.  However, having your nicknames on does seem to set a more casual tone for the wedding.  FI only EVER goes by his nickname, but I still put his full name on the invitations (although our wedding isn’t particularly formal, I just think of wedding invitations as being done that way). 

Long story short, Jackie and Bill sets a more casual, familiar feel, whereas Jacqueline Smith and William Jefferson sets a more formal tone.  Just depends what you want 🙂

On a semi-related note, which names do you plan to use during your vows?

Post # 9
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I used the name I go by, not my legal name. Husband goes by his middle name so his was first initial middle name. Use what you’re mosy comfortable with. I personally don’t think that the formality of the wedding should cause you to use your full, legal name, except if you’re royalty or marrying a prince or some other such royal. 

Post # 10
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@jg780806:  Well, your full names are more formal, and the invitation will reflect the general level of formality of the wedding.  So, it really has more to do with how formal you want the invitation to feel, and what you want people to infer about the ceremony and reception.

Post # 12
Member
10999 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I absolutely and without hesitation would use your formal names.

You honestly have the rest of your lives to issue invitations (for dinner parties, housewarmings, holidays, children’s birthday parties, etc.) using your nicknames. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to be more formal than you normally are in everyday life. 

The fact that your nicknames are easily recognizable from your formal names means there should be no confusion among your family and friends that it is you who are getting married. 🙂

Post # 13
Member
2276 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@jg780806:  I would put your full names, your wedding seems too formal for jackie and bill :p.

Post # 14
Member
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I’d lean towards formal names, I just like how fancy it always looks!!!  It adds a nice sense of occasion I think. 

Post # 15
Member
1226 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I would lean towards formal names, because of the formal nature of your wedding.

I have a friend who goes by his middle name, so his name is, for example, John Samuel but he goes by Samuel. When we got these invites from ‘John Lastname’ we were like…what? We didn’t even know that was his real first name! So that was a bit confusing. But I think with nicknames it’s easier to make the switch to formal names.

Post # 16
Member
1194 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’m actually afraid people are going to think we’re using nicknames when we’re not. We’re using our full names, but we both have very short first names and FI’s is a name that’s typically a nickname (think Drew for Andrew) and while mine isn’t, people often ask if it’s short for something. Obviously everyone on his side will know that it’s actually his full name and vice versa, but I don’t want any confusion.

 

P.S. I vote for formal!

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