- 7 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
What amount of participation do you expect from your BMs? And at what point during your planning (say 1 year to your W-Day) do you expect them to start giving you feedback or opinions?
I have this really bad pet peeve: I hate to repeat myself…..because when I have to say things or ask for things over and over….i feel like i’m being annoying. And I don’t like feeling that way.
Here is my situation:
I’m going to have 1 Maid/Matron of Honor…….1 Jr. Bridesmaid or Best Man (stepdaughter)……and 2 Bridesmaid or Best Man (sisters).
My Maid/Matron of Honor (is 8 hrs drive away) has been very active with me on the planning since day one, we email, IM and call each other.
My Jr. Bridesmaid or Best Man gives me feedback too (she thinks we should go to Italy for our Honeymoon and she should go with us). She loves the Oleg Cassini CRL277 gown that I like too.
My 2 other BMs also live in the same area as my Maid/Matron of Honor (I asked them out of courtesy for my Mom):
Bridesmaid or Best Man_46 is my older half Sister and she has 2 tween kids and going to nursing school (Stay at home Mom/widow)….she and I are not close. I tried to be closer to her when I was younger but i don’t think she likes me that much. I’ve always felt that she has resentments about me. Also I hear she was the prettiest girl in the family till I came along (she is quite vain). Doesn’t answer her phone either.
Bridesmaid or Best Man_26 is my younger Sister who also has a 2 yr old child and husband (she works)….we are closer to each other because we have the same Dad but our personalities are opposites. I feel that she’s maybe bitter she is not my Maid/Matron of Honor but I believe I made the right choice. Bridesmaid or Best Man_26 never answers my calls, or calls me back. When i need to get a hold of her really bad I have to send her an email, Facebook message her, call her cell# and text her….then she will text me back. I’ve sent her several emails and voicemails trying to get her feedback. She responded once when I posted in her facebook threatening that she’s going to be wearing a moo-moo dress if I didn’t hear from her. Ugh! frustrating.
So 2 days ago, I sent them all a facebook message updating them on the date change, letting them know we booked the venue, sent them the links and asking them for feed back on the Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses that I had in mind. Also if they were interested in getting their hair and make up professionally done for them on the day. I live out in the middle of nowhere so MUAs are hard to come by in my area. And I don’t want to pay the extra $1 – $1.50/pm times 60+ miles for a MUA to drive to me. So I’d like to book them soon. I also asked if they would like me to go to them so we could all go to a bridal salon to try dresses on.
I know it’s only been 2 days and people have things to do. But I am concerned that this is going to become a pattern. I mentioned this to FH and he said don’t worry because we’ve still got a long way to go. So I am curious what you ladies are having to deal with.
PS: My wedding party doesn’t have to do anything else but to help me choose their attire (they pay for the dress) and show up a day and a half before the wedding day. I am also playing with the idea that if they don’t start responding back to me by New Year’s (8 mos from wedding day) that I’m going to remove them from my wedding party and replace them with my 2 best guys friends and my little bother.