Post # 1
Newlywed we’d here! We just got married this weekend! I woke up Sunday thinking everything thing went basically perfect. I was surprised at how well things went. Usually there’s some hiccups, but things went pretty smoothe.
Any ways, so Monday rolls around and one of my bridesmaids comes over and she’s complaining about the food. We had a 7:30pm ceremony and 8pm reception. So we decided to do pass appetizers served to our guest on platters by servers, so people could get the night going! We order MORE than enough food for everyone! Well early mentioned bridesmaid is a vegetarian. And THE ONLY vegetarian at the wedding. So because she was in the wedding I even added a full order of another veggie appetizer she picked out and she knew it was costing us $400+ to do that. People weren’t crazy about them ( I knew they wouldn’t be) but we served them anyways. She also knew there were only going to be two veggie options so she ate before the wedding.
so now after the wedding she’s complaining that there wasnt enough food and that EVERYONE she spoke to was starving. I’m even hearing about this from people she’s not friends with, and she’s complaining to them the next day!! She’s also complaining that we didn’t serve more food to our close friends who stayed and hungout all night. Who’s expected to serve two dinners at a wedding???
any who, everyone we spoke to says they were full and we had leftovers. I still can’t help but think they could be lying and I’m now feeling embarrassed but quite pissed! How do I handle the bridesmaid?
Post # 2
I probably wouldn’t say anything, but if you felt like you needed to, I’d just go in with the, “Oh, hey, I’ve heard from a few people that you were starving at the wedding and didn’t get enough food. I’m so sorry about that!” and point out that you know she’s talking about your wedding behind your back.
Post # 3
I wouldn’t say a word. If there were leftovers, you clearly had plenty to eat. You sound like you were more than accommadating. She’s only embarrassing herself, so you really don’t have to say anything to her or anyone else.
Post # 4
- Wedding: July 2014 - Prague
I would be pissed as well. How you handle it depends on your relationship with her. If you are very close–which I think you might be based on the fact that she came over on Monday–, I’d bring it up in the least attacking way possible. There are many Bees with very good advice on topics like this, so I’m sure people will suggest ways to approach it.
If you’re not close to her, I’d just let it go.
Post # 5
You know what, some people in life are just like that. They could have the most positive situation and find the negative. More fool her for her bad attitude. You had your day it was perfect DO NOT let her bad attitude give you bad memories. Leave her to it and hold your head high xx
Post # 6
Wait your BM had to provide her own dinner before the event because there wasn’t going to be enough food for her to eat? I can kind of see why she is pissed off. I am assuming that she had to come early for hair and make up etc?
I would never not make sure that someone who was close enough to be in my bridal party had enough to eat at my wedding.
Post # 7
I would ignore it. She’s being pissy because there wasn’t much for her to eat since she’s a vegetarian. I get grumpy when I’m hungry, as well. However, it’s in poor taste for her to broadcast her views so publicly. But what you are going to do? Call her out on it? She has the right to complain, especially since it sounds like she was legitimately, hungry. Just ignore it and focus on how much fun you had.
Post # 8
Regardless of what people say, it’s obvious that you’re still upset about this incident. Since this BM was a friend enough to you for you to ask her to be in your wedding, you have every right to go to her directly and ask her point blank, why the heck she’s talking crap about your wedding to people. That is not cool that someone who was supposed to support you at your wedding is being so negative about her experience. The best thing would have been for her to come to you and tell you how she felt vs. gossiping.
If I were you, I would immediately go and try to have a convo with her about what she’s doing.
Post # 9
Not much of a friend, if you ask me.
Post # 10
Sfcali: She sounds like a bitter annoying person. If she were my friend I would call her out on her bull
Post # 11
Just curious, what kind of food did you have at your wedding? I usually don’t get full on just passed appetizers because the servers are flitting around all night.
Post # 12
If you’re good friends, I would ask her honestly and with the intention of apologizing if she were starving,” hey, BM, I heard you were left hungry at our wedding! I’m so sorry! What could we have done to prevent that? ”
then you will find out that she’s just grousing, or you were told wrong information, or she really was hungry.
Post # 13
Did your guests know it wasn’t a sit-down dinner? If I didn’t know ahead of time, I would probably have been surprised and hungry. It’s okay to not do a full meal, but if it was a formal wedding, I have to admit that passing around appetizers would strike me as odd.
Post # 14
j_jaye: I provided the food while getting ready and it was 75% veggie friendly 🙂
Post # 15
canadajane: We had double the amount if food that would have been on a dinner plate and we served food for a few hours so people didn’t have to shove a bunch if food in there mouths.