(Closed) Bridesmaid dresses: They want them too short

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Fingertip length bridesmaid dresses at a church ceremony: Too short?
    Yes : (87 votes)
    90 %
    No : (10 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 3
    Hostess
    13662 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    Mid-thigh is WAY too short for a BM dress, especially if it’s a church wedding, in my opinion. Put your foot down. Insist that they be dressed in church-appropriate lengths. This is bigger than their vanity when the church is involved.

    Post # 4
    Member
    3266 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    I would take the blame off you and say that it’s not appropriate for the church. It’s not like you’d be lying! That is far too short of a church wedding.

    Post # 5
    Member
    3697 posts
    Sugar bee

    Mid-thigh or above for bridesmaids sounds alarmingly short to me, especially for a church wedding. You need to tell them that this is not open to negotiations. If they want fingertip length for their bridesmaids when they get married, that’s their problem … ahem, I meant decision … but this one is your call. If they are in really short skirts at your church wedding, it will reflect on you as the bride and people will think you have poor taste or no sense, when that is clearly NOT the case.

    Post # 6
    Hostess
    13662 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    I just stood up at my desk at work to see where “fingertip length” would be for me. And holy cow, I’d never wear a dress that short in a church or even for a semi-formal wedding!

    Post # 7
    Member
    4416 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Ah, the fingertip rule … I still use that when deciding if a skirt is work-appropriate or not! I would never ever wear something that short except to the beach or the bar. Definitely put your foot down on church-appropriateness. They’ll get over it.

    Post # 8
    Member
    6512 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    WAY too short!  I like short skirts in general, but not for weddings, and esp. not a church wedding! 

    Post # 9
    Member
    2695 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2008

    It is a church wedding and YOU are paying for the dresses? Then you have every right to determine what the right length is.  Tell them while you understand that they don’t love it,it is not up for discussion.  Tell them you appreciate them understanding that this is important to you.  End of story.  Only bring your mom if you are positive she will stick to the length – just tell her its how you want it, and you don’t want her to waffle.  I would hope she of all people could support her daughter- what is “trendy” about a short dress anyways?

    Post # 10
    Member
    4194 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    I voted yes, and I just saw that you’re paying for this- you *definitely* dictate the length. Call the shop that’s doing the alterations ahead of time what you want.

    The girls can alter the dresses as short as they want to AFTER the wedding.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1132 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    That’s way too short for a church wedding in my opinion. Also, you are paying for the dresses, so that’s even more reason for this not to be a discussion.

    Post # 12
    Member
    267 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I agree–if they want them short, they can get them re-altered after the wedding to wear them elsewhere.

    I feel like it should really not even be an issue! You’re the bride, they’re there for you, what you decide should be the final word.

    Post # 13
    Member
    1190 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I totally agree with you! That length is NOT appropriate for a church wedding. You are going to and participating in a wedding NOT going to a night club to pick up!!

    Post # 14
    Member
    3569 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Umm tbey are going to a wedding not the club, even at a wedding that not at church it may not be appropriate. Stand your ground on this one. Speak to the girls tell them you are Sorry(with an eye roll) but you cannot budget on this issue.

    Post # 15
    Member
    3699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    *They* can certainly pay to have the hem taken up 8 inches after the wedding if they want to wear them again.  Fingertip length is way too short for a wedding, especially in a church.  You don’t need them flashing their goodies at everyone. 

    Just make sure that *you* order the dresses and specify the length and make a note that they remain knee-length.  Threaten to not pay if the shop shortens them.  Money talks. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    339 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Oh my, this is far too short.  Since you are paying for the dresses, you have all the authority in it.  Even if you weren’t paying for it, you’re the bride, and your girls are representing you on that day, so you’d still have the say in this matter.  But regardless, they should understand where you are coming from and stop worrying how sexy they look.  This is a church wedding and no one is going to think they are boring/homely if they dress appropriately for the venue.  Tell them its classy to dress appropriately…wouldn’t they want to be classy & fabulous?  Sometimes a little manipulation is all you need 🙂

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