Post # 1
I don’t mean to sound whiney, but my birthday was on Tuesday (28, alright!) and one of my bridesmaids still hasn’t called/texted/facebooked/emailed to wish me a happy birthday! She is my best friend from childhood and we’ve kept in touch over the years. I was just in her wedding in August and totally went out of my way to attend every single event and make a big deal over her on her Birthday!
I know she just started a new job and she’s kind of busy, but that makes me even more angry because I called her on her first day to see how it went! Shouldn’t it be my turn now?? Ugh!
Post # 3
Happy Belated!! You are not being whiney but maybe she has a lot on her plate! I hate to admit this but every year I have to scramble to remember my bestfriend’s birthday! And I love her to pieces and the same for her! She sent me a text the day before my birthday, then right after she sent, opps, brain freeze–wrong day!
She just has alot on her mind, you should call her and say, “I think somebody needs a vacay because one of my best friends forgot my BIRTHDAY.” ( In a nice voice) I am sure you two will get a good laugh!!
Post # 4
LOL, welcome to the club. One of my bridesmaids forgot mine a few weeks ago – and it was my 30th! I just chalked it up to her being busy (and several states away).
Post # 5
Happy belated to you!
I don’t always remember my friend’s birthdays. I actualy have to put it into my calendar with a recurring date EVERY YEAR to remind myself. It’s easy to slip your mind when you don’t actively write it down and say “i must say happy bday” or “i must take her to dinner!” although I know it sucks to get glazed over like that
Post # 6
Yeah, I have to say, I don’t really know anyone’s birthday except my sister’s or my fiance’s. If I don’t have plans to go to dinner/go out with a particular person, and I don’t sign on Facebook that day, I’m not going to remember it. I try to write them in my calendar every year and always end up forgetting one or two.
Post # 7
Happy Belated 🙂
I have to confess I am awful at birthdays too – I try really hard but sometimes things slip! Try to not take it too personally or as some big sign of your importance to her.
Post # 8
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
Happy belated birthday! Try to cut her some slack… birthdays just aren’t a big deal to everyone. I forgot one of my best friends’ birthdays… TWO YEARS IN A ROW. I made sure not to forget his 30th or I don’t think he would ever have spoken to me again. 😉
Post # 9
Yeah I’m really bad with birthdays as well. Sometimes I forget my own birthday LOL! Birthdays are VERY important to my FI, so when we started dating, he made memorize his birthday. Every so often, out of the blue, he’d be like “ok so when’s my bday?” to make sure I still remembered. It’s now etched in stone. My point is, some people just suck at remembering birthdays and it doesn’t mean they don’t love you.
Post # 10
Thanks everyone! I totally understand being forgetful about birthdays, trust me I am guilty of it as well. But I”m just upset after all I’ve done for her that she can’t even remember my birthday. I know it’s not a big deal, but to be honest I’m kind of annoyed and hurt. I don’t really buy the ‘too busy’ argument, because I am one of the busiest people I’ve ever met and I still managed to remember hers this year AND her first day at her new job in addition to the bach party, shower and driving her around everywhere the week before her wedding.
I just want it to be ‘my turn’, you know??
Post # 11
That is a bummer that she forgot but it doesn’t mean she doesn’t care. She may be really overwhelmed by her load right now. I’ve done it before and people have done it to me. It feels even worse when you’ve forgotten someone elses, when she realizes it she’ll make a big belated deal of it.
Post # 12
Happy belated birthday!!
Look, for many people birthday’s are just not that important so they assume everyone feels that way. I’m definitely one of those people. We have cake pretty much everytime it’s someone’s birthday at my office and it drives me batty. I just don’t care about birthdays – everyone has one, every year and past the age of say 21, I just think they become an obligation.
Anyway, don’t let this become an issue if she is a good friend – it’s just not worth it. Try not to judge her based on how “you” would have handled it. As I said, not everyone value’s the same things and it’s really not fair to assume she does.
Post # 13
I’m sorry your friend forgot your birthday! I know it sucks when it’s a close friend.
Some people just didn’t grow up in a house where birthdays were a huge deal after they were a little kid. Some people just have a really hard time remembering b-days. One of my BFs has forgotten mine so many times that it is a running joke now. My b-day always falls around Thanksgiving, so a lot of people forget or they don’t have time to celebrate on my day. I used to hate it, but now, I love it because some people want to celebrate early before the craziness of the Holiday, some still celebrate on my day and some feel guilty they forgot or were OOT and want to take me out after. It turns into a month long b-day celebration!
I would take the suggestion from chaotic bliss and send her a funny text or email. I’m sure she’ll want to make plans.
Happy Belated Birthday!!!!!
Post # 14
I’m the biggest b’day celebrator I know. I LOVE LOVE LOVE birthdays (probably because my mom always made it a huge deal for me growing up). I’m the one everyone calls to find out when someone’s b’day is (I have this weird memory for dates).
That said – I’d be soooo sad if a close friend missed my b’day. It would totally bum me out and I always thought it was so rude and inconsiderate…. UNTIL – I did it myself. TOTALLY missed a very close friend’s b’day. I don’t know WHAT the heck was going on – but it just fell off my radar. It was 110% uncharacteristic of me, and I felt like such a heel when I realized what I did.
I’m sure your friend will be mortified when she realizes what happened. Please try not to be too upset with her in the meantime. But, I totally get the annoyed factor. Is she the type to not be overly considerate with friends? Meaning, not one to show affection through celebrations/gifts for b’days?
Post # 15
I’d kick her. Put on the pointiest heels you know and kick her! (ok that’s the child in me) but man I’m a HUGE celebrator of birthdays and I forget EVERYBODY’s so i just have it on my calendar on my phone with reminders a week in advance so I don’t do this.
OOOoo or make her wear like a really hidious shoe for the wedding…. (sorry inner child in me again.)
I would do this if she forgot my birthday. I would send her a singing telegram for her birthday.. complete with costume 🙂 I bet she would never forget your birthday again!!!
Post # 16
I’m so horrible with remembering birthdays that I have to advise just cutting her some slack on this one. I’m also not a big one for making a bug huge deal out of my birthday. I’m not really into getting older. I’m at the point where I try to ignore them. Maybe she’s just not as into the whole birthday thing as you are. A lot of people aren’t. I wouldn’t take offense to it. I don’t think she meant to hurt your feelings and I think you shouldn’t let it upset you. If you just simply can’t get over it, then mention it to her, but I think it’s really not that big a deal in the long run. (P.S. I just had a birthday and I refused to let anyone do anything because I was decidedly unhappy about entering my late twenties.)