(Closed) Bridesmaid Gifts…

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
3969 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@blueskye:  I didn’t know it couldn’t be a gift they could use on the wedding day. I was given a pair of earrings (that went well with my dress!) and was told I could wear them or I could wear something different, but they  were given at the rehearsal dinner. There was no issue about that not being our Bridesmaid or Best Man gift if we wore them the next day!

Post # 4
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I, too, had no idea that there had to be gifts that aren’t wedding associated. I wonder if this is consumer marketing making us this this way… It’s not in any of the wedding guide books I’ve read.

Anyway, I’m not even buying my BMs their dresses or shoes and we’ll probably end up doing each other’s make up. I can’t afford a stylist or salon/spa days. Plus, we’re not that type of people, anyway.

I plan on getting them either a necklace, earrings, or a bracelet to wear for the wedding. That’s it. They can wear it any other times, too. I think it’s silly to buy multiple gifts that fit into different categories (for the wedding, not for the wedding, thanks for being my Bridesmaid or Best Man, etc.).

Post # 5
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

For me, it’s just good manners (not even sure I’d call it etiquette?). If the bridesmaids are doing m a favor by being in my wedding and contributing to its success by helping plan, or giving me sanity checks, I’d be in the wrong to NOT give them a gift. But the bridal party jewelry isn’t for them— it’s for my wedding, so they look nice and help make me look nice. While I might do them a favor and buy them something they’ll use again, its primary purpose is for my wedding. Therefore, I’m not doing them any kindness by giving it.

Of course, none of these rules are set in stone, and you should decide what’s best for you, your bridesmaids, and your budget. All I know is, I’d feel bad if they did all this work for me and all they got in return was something I bought for my wedding.

Post # 6
2107 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@blueskye:  I read this the first time too on another thread this morning, and I was really confused, because I had never heard of it before.  I gifted my bridesmaids necklaces and earrings to wear on the wedding day, and in my experience, it’s pretty normal.  I also got them shawls, and made them personalized hangers and wine glasses.  With the exception of the wine glasses and hangers, they’re all things that they could use in the future, so I don’t think I was breaking any etiquette rules. 

Post # 7
2281 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’ve been a bridesmaid, like, 8 times, and every single time the gift was something to wear on the wedding day. Usually jewelry. I was perfectly happy to receive it, since being a bridesmaid was not about getting stuff.

Post # 8
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’ve never heard this rule before, but it sort of make sense (per what @fishbone: said).  That being said, I can also see the logic of if you didn’t make them buy anything for the day, (i.e., you bought them the dress and/or did their hair, etc.), then a really lovely card thanking them for everything they have done for you might be enough.    

I got my girls a really beautiful dupioni silk jewlery bag with their name embroidered in it, so that they can put all of their jewelry from the other weddings they’re in into it.  Hope that counts! 

Post # 9
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@blueskye:  Most brides don’t pay for their bridesmaids’ dresses, so you’re already doing them a favor. I think buying them jewelry as a gift is fine. The most important thing is to include a personal note to each one, thanking them and telling them what it means to you to have them stand up for you.

Post # 12
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

On the one hand I didn’t ask my bridesmaids for help with any planning, and one bridesmaid out of eight ended up planning my bridal shower because my grandmother had to have emergency surgery and she was the one who had wanted to throw it and that bridesmaid graciously offered to do it. But on the other hand, they did have to buy the dress (not shoes or hair/makeup or anything else). I got them one gift and it was a double perfume stick from Coach. 

Post # 13
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@blueskye:  I was thinking of sailboat ride at sunset with some wine and cheese one evening before the wedding

If I were your bridesmaid, I would like that a lot more than most material gifts!!

Post # 14
887 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

My bridesmaids didn’t help plan the wedding or really even talk to me at all about it, set-up or tear down reception venue, travel, or throw/attend any bachelorette party or shower. I paid for their dresses and didn’t have any hair/make-up/shoe requirements, so I didn’t feel that it was necessary to get them anything else. I think what you’ve done is fine, OP!

Post # 16
3452 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Everytime I’ve been in a wedding, it was a piece of jewelry to wear in the wedding. 

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